Credit: AlloyDigital

With monsters like these, who needs friends? 

Former BFFLs Lady Gaga and Perez Hilton are at one another's throats once again, thanks to some mean girl antics and some highly coveted Manhattan real estate.

First, Lady Gaga accused the self-proclaimed of Queen of All Media of sending her threatening texts, calling her recent time spent in a wheelchair "karma" and now, she's gone so far as to claim that he's stalking her on her home turf.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Perez was eyeing some NYC real estate, which just so happened to be in the same building as Lady Gaga's apartment, which sent her little monsters into a fury. Gaga claimed stalking, and soon, death threats started pouring in to Perez.

He quickly released a statement to quash the nastiness between them and to save himself from the very real possibility of getting shanked with a fan's prosthetic cheekbone.

"My heart hurts that my former very good friend Lady GaGa, a person I used to call my 'wifey' and traveled the world with, is making very public and very untrue allegations about me on Twitter," he wrote. "While it is still too painful for me to go into detail about why I chose to no longer make her a part of my life, I will say that I am a critic and not a stalker. Any allegation that I am stalking her is utterly false, defamatory and now appear to be putting me in danger. I will continue to be a critic -- in a way that is not mean or involves name-calling, and I will continue to have an opinion and talk about music and songs, like GaGa's 'Applause.' As the suggestion that I pose a danger to GaGa is preposterous, if fans want to send a message of support to her, they should buy her music." 

Let's just keep this one thing clear: Perez's statement in no way precludes a dance-off in the future, so let's not get bummed about this being over yet.