We were very excited heading into tonight’s episode of Awkward (Season 2, Episode 4: “Are You There, God? It’s Me, Jenna”) for two reasons: Jenna was going to Church Camp with Lissa (check out our exclusive interview with Greer Grammer here), and one of our favorite TV villains of all time would be featured prominently. That’s right. Sadie is back, bitches.
Jenna is feeling incredibly guilty about her impact on Jake and Matty’s relationship, keeping her Matty secret from Jake, and about possibly being the cause of her parents splitting up. So she actually agrees to go to church with, of all people, her mother.
Jenna’s mom brought two additional guests to church, and they were on full display, popping out of her pink top. But then Jenna sees a sign, and it was sort of from God. Or something. The ad for Upbeat Retreat asks vague questions like, “Are you feeling guilty?” (aren’t we all?), and that’s when one of God’s perky messengers, Lissa, pops up with a smile on her face.
Lissa says that Jenna should totally come on the retreat. “There’s a Saints and Sinners party,” she announces, before whispering that they like to call it the “halo’d bros and biblical hos” party. What would Jenna do? As she says, “Home no longer felt like a safe haven.” Besides, Lissa introduces her to her pastor as “The harlot who stole my boyfriend.” So Jenna agrees to go, saying, “I think I need a little spiritual guidance right now.”
Sadie, missing nothing, tries once again to steer former BFF Lissa away from Jenna. But Lissa’s tale of going to Church Camp with her future “best friend” Jenna really puts Sadie’s panties in a twist. Lissa, impressively, stands up for herself (and for Jenna), by telling Sadie she should come too, because she had her own sins to atone for.
We’re really not sure why Jenna keeps going to Val for advice, but she does anyway, telling her, “My parents are separated.” Val’s first response is, “Your dad is single?” before calming down and slightly offering consolation. “That must be hard for you considering how attractive he is,” she says.
We only get a very brief glimpse of Jake and Matty this week, but it’s packed with a punch. Jake is trying to console Matty, who is sad about a girl who teased him and led him on all summer. Um, Jenna much? All this just makes Jenna feel even more guilty, so off to Church Camp she goes.
Boarding the bus, Jenna is welcomed with hugs and guitars and hair ribbons. And Sadie. The queen bee remarks, “Ho bags are relegated to the back of the bus,” with her signature saccharine Saxton smile, dripping with sass.
Sadie tries threatening Jenna from the start, but Lissa (again, impressively!) spots her being, well, un-Christian by being so bitchy to Jenna. “Physically, you’re here,” she says to Sadie. “But spiritually, you’re like, in Canada.”
And that’s when we get to the highly anticipated Saints and Sinners party. Sadie is dressed as Mary, and Jenna is the devil disguised as a snake. Everyone’s dancing like they know they won’t be Left Behind, but then Sadie confronts Jenna on the dance floor. The pregnant Virgin and the snake who “ruined Paradise” are about to go at it, but then it’s time for the horrifying Share Circle.
Basically everyone sits in a circle in the dark and points hundreds of flashlights at whoever’s on the spot. Sadie tries to get Jenna to “confess” to attempting suicide, but Jenna quiets all the nonsense by screaming, “I love Satan!” repeatedly until she’s finally allowed to leave the Upbeat Retreat.
On her blog that night, Jenna writes that she wasn’t really looking for God to absolve her of her guilt. “What I really needed was to absolve myself.” And that’s when the mysterious anonymous commenter leaves a note saying, “You’re not alone, Jenna. I’m here.” Jenna writes, “Who are you?” And he or she (though we suspect it’s a He) writes, “Not God.”
Who do you think the unknown commenter is? Jenna’s mom again, trying to absolve her own sins? A new stalker? Or could it be Matty? Tell us what you think in the comments!
Catch an all-new Awkward on Thursday, July 26 at 10:30 p.m. ET/PT on MTV.
Molly Friedman is an editor at Wetpaint Entertainment. Follow her on Twitter @MollyFriedman.
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