Chris Brown shocked the world when he brutally assaulted his then-girlfriend Rihanna in 2009 and while the general public still seems to be holding its grudge against Chris, the pop starlet herself is apparently much more forgiving.  

In an emotional interview with Oprah Winfrey for the talk show queen’s series, Oprah’s Next Chapter, Rihanna opens up about that tragic night and explains why she decided to keep up a relationship with the man who assaulted her.

"We love each other and we probably always will, and that's not anything that we're going to try to change," Rihanna told Oprah, explaining that whenever she sees Chris, "it's awkward because I still love him...my stomach drops and I have to maintain this poker face and not let it get to the outer part of me. I have to maintain that and suppress it."

"I think he was the love of my life," the singer went on to say. "He was my first love and I see that he loved me the same way...I truly love him — the main thing for me is he's at peace. I'm not at peace if he's not happy or he's still lonely. I care. It actually matters that he finds that peace."

Rihanna also explained that by forgiving her father, who was abusive towards the singer’s mother when she was growing up, she was able to forgive Chris. 

"All kinds of emotions started happening after that," she said. "All kinds of things started making sense. I thought I hated Chris and I realized it was love that was tarnished. It looked like hate because it was ugly, it was angry, it was inflamed, it was tainted and I realized that what it was is, I have to forgive him, because I cared about him still. And the minute I let go of that, I started living again.”

Source: E! Online

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