Sisterly love! In this week's Once Upon a Time Season 3, Episode 13 (“Witch Hunt”), Snow needs to do a better background check for potential babysitters, Regina may want to consult her family tree, and Rumple isn't exactly staying in a bed and breakfast. 

Regina and Emma Pull a Fast One on Everyone

In Storybrooke, Henry meets David and Snow at Granny's diner. But he doesn’t remember who they are and instead assumes they’re bail-jumpers. As if. Henry also sees Regina but doesn’t recognize her either. Thus, Regina assures Emma that she didn’t cast the curse, as it’s resulted in so much pain for her.

Emma calls a town meeting, and everyone instantly assumes that Regina is responsible for the curse. Isn’t it nice to know your friends will support you through thick and thin? Regina then freaks out and gets all magical on everyone, which is definitely not how our town's meetings tend to go. However, we learn that Regina and Emma are just pretending to fight. Phew.

Snow is freaking out about rare baby ailments  ah, the joys of parenting  when a stranger named Zelena, a.k.a. the Wicked Witch, calms her down. Zelena is a midwife and says she would love to help Snow and her baby. She then reaches out to touch Snow’s stomach, and it is all kinds of creepy.

Who Hasn't Always Dreamed of Getting to Fly?

Robin’s pal Little John has some kind of vendetta against a poor turkey, but before he can kill it, John crosses the town border and ends up getting snatched up by a flying monkey. As one does. Our heroes soon find John, but he’s been bitten, and while he’s in the hospital, he turns into a flying monkey. It’s kinda like that Tim Allen movie The Shaggy Dog, only much less adorable.

Regina and Emma prove to be pretty adorable as besties, and so they wait out at Regina’s office after letting everyone know Regina was trying to recreate the memory potion. They see a shadow in the office, but when they arrive, someone has shockingly broken Regina’s blood lock. So, either it’s someone who shares Regina’s blood, or it’s one of the characters from Ocean’s Eleven, since those guys are, like, really good at breaking into places. 

Finally, Regina and Henry have a chat, where Regina tells him he’s good at school. What a thrilling conversation topic for a young boy, Regina. And then they end their exchange with a handshake, which has gotta hurt.

Come On, Baby, Light My Fire

In our flashbacks to Fairytale Land, Regina tells everyone about the Wicked Witch but says she’s never met her. After saving Robin Hood’s son from a flying monkey, he wants to repay her. So he helps Regina on her quest to the castle to put out the flame in the courtyard that protects the spell. Get the fire extinguisher. 

Credit: ABC

During their quest — there’s always downtime on a quest, right? — Robin admits that his wife died because he put her in harm’s way. And Regina also admits to missing her son. What's more romantic than talking about super sad stuff, right? When they arrive at the door to her crypt, they see that someone has opened it, despite Regina having sealed it with blood and magic. Apparently, blood and magic aren’t as reliable as they used to be.

I Know Why the Caged Rumple Sings

Regina finally gets rid of the flame and is about to prick herself with a sleeping curse when the Wicked Witch barges in. The witch shockingly tells Regina that she could break her blood lock because she is — wait for it — Regina’s half-sister. Say what? So does this make Regina the Wicked Witch of the… uh, some direction other than West? Perhaps she’s the Wicked Witch of North West, and her sole duty is to scare Kim Kardashian and Kanye’s child.

Now, Regina has her purpose, which is to destroy her half-sister. Keep in mind, of course, that Regina has already (inadvertently) killed their mother, Cora. And we thought our family was dysfunctional.

Finally, the biggest shocker of the night is seeing that the Wicked Witch has trapped Rumple in a cage. And if you thought he was a little off his rocker before, that’s nothing compared to now, as he keeps reciting, “You feed the madness, and it feeds on you.” Poor guy could use a hug.

Three Biggest Mysteries of the Night:

— What does the Wicked Witch want with Rumple? And how did she manage to save his life, given that things were looking so grim for him after that epic battle with Peter Pan?

— Zelena’s chat with Snow about her baby was mighty creepy. So what does Zelena have planned for that poor fetus? And did Zelena have something to do with Snow getting preggers in the first place?

— Who is the Wicked Witch’s dad? We can only imagine it’s someone we’ve already met, so we’re very curious. And speaking of the curse, how will Henry get his memory back? And where the heck is Neal?