Need a hand? In this week’s episode of Once Upon a Time (Season 2, Episode 4: “The Crocodile”), Belle discovers the wonders of pancakes; Ruby smells other people’s dirty clothes; and Rumple and Belle break the one rule that you’re not supposed to break: they talk in a library.

Dream a Little Dream Of Me (But Preferably Not Of Me Killing Someone)

It turns out that even Belle’s subconscious doesn’t trust Gold, as the episode begins with Belle having a nightmare that Gold is about to pull out Grumpy’s heart. Then again, we don’t blame Gold for wanting to smack Grumpy around a little.

In real life, Belle peeks into the basement and sees that Gold is spinning straw into gold and is then putting the straw into a bottle and turning it purple. In other words, Rumple is dabbling in magic, and Belle ain’t happy. Wait if chicks don’t dig guys who can do magic, then how come David Copperfield was with supermodel Claudia Schiffer for so long?

Charming is now the acting sheriff, and in his free time, he’s also mining for fairy dust with the dwarves. And did we mention that he looks amazing when he’s wearing a tank top while swinging an axe? Because, well, he does. 

Books Lead to Belle Getting Kidnapped Which Is Why We Avoid Reading Books At All Costs

Gold realizes that Belle is missing and her father, Moe, doesn’t know where she is, so Gold turns to David for help. It turns out, however, that Moe has found someone even better than David at tracking people down: William Smee, a burly guy who really loves wearing red knit caps for some reason.

Belle looks in through the window at the now-shuttered library (apparently everyone in Storybrooke does their reading on Kindles these days), where Smee kidnaps her and reunites her with her dad. This is sweet uh, for about five freakin’ seconds, until Moe realizes that Belle is in love with Rumple, so he has Smee drag her off somewhere. It seems that the dragging-people-around-for-hire business is a lucrative one in Storybrooke.

Gold and David finally make progress in their search for Belle when they find Ruby, who is able to get Belle’s scent from a sweater that she just wore. See, people if you ever want to avoid doing laundry for a few days, just tell explain that you’re doing it as a precautionary measure in case you ever go missing. Oh, and by the way, how cute was it when Gold asks David for dating advice? Awww!

Be Mine

Ruby leads them to Moe’s flower shop, Game of Thorns (winter is coming, which is tough for the flower business), where David notices that there’s soot from the mine on Moe’s hands. And may this be a lesson to you: If you ever kidnap someone and lock them in a mine, always remember to use hand sanitizer afterwards.

Moe wants to send Belle across the Storybrooke boundary line so that she’ll forget all about Rumple even if it means forgetting about her dad and everyone else, too. Smee locks Belle in a mine cart and sends her out of town, and it almost works until Gold magically pulls Belle back to safety. And her memory is still intact! Oh, happy days, right?

Er, not so fast. Belle is peeved that Gold is too cowardly to be honest with her which is reminiscent of David’s advice to Gold about being honest and she’s also a bit pissed at her dad for the whole “trying to erase her entire self of self” thing. She’s like, “I never want to see you again, Rumple that is, unless you can think of a grand gesture that will prove how much you’ve changed and will win me back. But good luck ever coming up with something like that!”

And whaddya know? Rumple does come up with a pretty kickass grand gesture by giving her the key to the library. Even more importantly, Gold comes clean about his son having left him, and that he was only trying to use magic in the basement to leave Storybrooke and get him back. And as Gold is walking away, Belle invites him to get a burger with her sometime. Seriously how adorable are these two? (A note to Belle: Just wait till you try French fries.)

How Could Milah Be So Heartless?

In the flashback to Fairytale Land, Rumple’s wife Milah has gone out drinking with a bunch of pirates, which is what any good mother should do. She later tells Rumple that she wishes he would have fought the ogres, and she asks him if they can run away so he won’t be the village coward. This family is all about running away from things.

They don’t run away, and Rumple gets word that the pirates have taken Milah. So Rumple meets with the captain, Killian Jones, and let’s just say that this pirate is not as fun-loving as, say, Captain Jack Sparrow. The captain challenges Rumple to a duel, but Rumple is too afraid to fight. And yes, the captain is sort of a jerk, but we’ll overlook a fair amount of jerkiness when someone looks that hot. (It’s not easy to pull off guyliner, but somehow he manages.)

Later on, the captain encounters Rumple again and calls him a “crocodile,” but this time Rumple is the Dark One. So Rumple duels with the captain with his own sword (and we don’t really know dueling etiquette, but that’s probably rude).

Rumple is about to kill him when Milah appears, whom the captain had said was dead. Milah wants to trade their lives for the magic bean that she has which Smee had offered to Gold in exchange for youth. In other words, this is one popular bean. (But that makes sense, since the Blue Fairy said last season that there weren’t any magic beans left.)

As it turns out, Milah fell in love with the captain instantly on the night that she met him, and he’s her true love. She then tells Rumple that she never loved him, which is not the smartest thing to tell a guy who has a whole mess of evil powers. Rumple pulls out her heart, killing her, and then removes the captain’s hand but leaves him alive so he can feel the pain that Rumple felt.

We then see Rumple pry open the captain’s hand, but alas, it’s bean-free. The captain who is now Captain Hook tosses the bean in the water, where it creates a giant hole, and he tells his new wingman Smee that they’re headed to Neverland to never grow old. Time for everyone to start practicing their crowing.

Then, we get to present day, and we learn that Cora and Captain Hook know each other, as they’re both at the safe haven together. Cora shows Hook the remains of the wardrobe, which she says is almost enough to get them to their destination: Storybrooke. Cora seeks her daughter there, and Hook seeks revenge on Rumple. There’s a whole lotta seeking goin’ on.

Top Three Biggest Mysteries of the Episode

- We’re super curious as to what Captain Hook’s relationship is with Cora, and if she had something to do with why the curse didn’t capture him. Either way, Captain Hook is going to be a lot of fun to watch (and drool over).

- We’re wondering if Hook might know where Baelfire is. And how exactly will Gold manage to leave Storybrooke to find Bae? We don’t know, but we’d hate to see what kind of chaos Cora and Hook would cause there. Yikes times a thousand.

- And now we can’t wait to figure out who Peter Pan might be. The big question: Could it be Baelfire? That certainly seems like a possibility. We’re also curious to find out who Rufio might be. (What no fans of the movie Hook out there? Fine, fine.)

Catch the next new episode of Once Upon a Time on Sunday, October 28 at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC.

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