Pretty Little Liars proves that anyone can lie, but it takes practice to do it with style. We've rounded up the best quotes from this week’s episode, Season 3, Episode 1: “It Happened ‘That Night’,” including Hanna setting some ground rules for her mom.
10. Hanna: “I need an aspirin and a trough of water.”
Frankly, we prefer bottled water to trough water, but to each his own.
9. Aria [about Ezra’s name]: “And my dad pretends like he can’t hear, but his neck gets all red, and then his face pinches up like he’s constipated.”
Spencer: “So basically Ezra is like Lord Voldemort.”
The English Teacher Who Must Not Be Named.
8. Emily [to Aria, about drinking]: “You’re a pixie — I’ve gotten really good at this.”
We don’t think “high tolerance for alcohol” is something you can put on your resume, Em.
7. Aria [about Ulysses]: “You still haven’t finished that book?”
Ezra: “No one has.”
Stop making excuses and buckle down, buddy.
6. Spencer [to Aria, about Mona]: “She can’t hurt us anymore — bitch crazy.”
Hanna: “Don’t worry, Aria. Someday we will all have jubilation.”
Uh, have Hanna and Spencer switched bodies like in Freaky Friday?
5. Hanna: “And in poor countries, one home is like a home for 50.”
Hanna’s vocabulary is as impressive as her knowledge of city planning.
4. Spencer: “Melissa is a Hastings — we bounce back like superballs.”
Melissa also resembles a superball in that she’s liable to smack you in the face if you aren’t careful.
3. Hanna [about the internship]: “I changed my mind. Turns out they want you to work for free.”
Hanna may have expanded her vocab, but she has yet to learn the word “intern.”
2. Emily: “Or I’ll show someone my boobs, and we’ll be news again.”
How to know when you’ve had enough to drink: You say something like this.
1. Hanna [to her mom]: “You’re allowed to date, but you’re not ‘open for business.’”
Yet more proof that the Marin women do not have a typical mother-daughter relationship.
Catch an all-new episode of PLL on Tuesday, June 12 at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC Family.
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