Don’t go, Ezra (Ian Harding)! In tonight’s episode of Pretty Little Liars (Season 3, Episode 17: “Out of the Frying Pan, Into the Inferno”), Hanna (Ashley Benson) makes a new female friend, Spencer (Troian Bellisario) lets the cat out of the bag, and Alison (Sasha Pieterse) is expecting a bundle of joy terror.

Wherein Aria Learns Why You Don’t Contact Your Boyfriend’s Exes


Why? Why did the show need to have Ezria kinda-sorta break up the week after Spoby broke up last week? Seriously, that’s just messed up. 

We see Ezra has his bags packed and is staying in a motel for the time being as he grapples with the fact that he’s about to meet his son. But the fact that Ez doesn’t want Aria (Lucy Hale) to call him — not to mention that he breaks down in tears — is just heartbreaking. Pain, people — we’re in serious pain here.

So what’s going to happen to Ezria? We can’t imagine they’ll break up for good, right?! And it’s tough because Aria makes progress with her dad this week, as Byron (Chad Lowe) promises to keep Meredith away from his family. Plus, speaking of Byron, it looks like he may have gotten his wish with Ezra out of the picture — but we sure didn’t get our wish. Come back, Ezra!

Wherein Spencer Decides That If Her Relationship Isn’t Going Well, No One’s Can

The episode begins with a scene of pure torture, as Spencer has a nightmare about hooking up with Toby (Keegan Allen). Why must you punish us with memories of what used to be, PLL? The big question now is: When will Spencer finally tell her pals about Toby’s affiliation? That should be a fun chat. Let’s just hope that private investigator uncovers something juicy about Toby to soften the blow.

And we’re doing our best to forgive Spencer for spilling the beans to Ezra about his son before Aria had a chance to. That said, we mainly don’t want to give Spencer a hard time about it because we don’t want her to lash out at us. Girlfriend was all kinds of angry during this episode.

Wherein Emily Finally Gets to a Chance to Study for Her Bio Exam Final From Two Years Ago

Emily (Shay Mitchell) gets an unpleasant blast from the past in the form of that box from Nate’s family. (“I really miss Nate,” said no one ever.) But an old bio notebook provides a lot of clues, between the mention of the “beach hottie” and a flashback to Toby threatening Ali by saying he wanted to join the “A” team. And you know how much we love clues

Then, Emily gets an even bigger scoop when she tracked down another blast from the past, CeCe (Vanessa Ray), who reveals that Ali was totally preggers at Cape May. So was Wilden the baby daddy? And by the way, the mere thought of Ali raising a child just gave us a permanent case of the chills.

Wherein Hanna Learns Not to Accept Every Raspberry Flirtini She Gets Offered

We hate that Haleb seems so fragile, considering so many other relationships are in tatters. We can’t handle yet another breakup! So why would Caleb (Tyler Blackburn) not have told Hanna he was involved in putting the cow brain in Mona's (Janel Parrish) locker? Of course, we have zero problem with him putting a brain in Mona’s locker, mind you. We just want to see a little healthy communication.

We also love how Hanna tried a little “A”-style stalking of her own this week, as she spies on Paige (Lindsey Shaw) and Shana from Pretty Dirty Secrets at the gay bar (or is it a “club,” Hanna?). So why were they talking? And what gets raspberry flirtini out of vintage T-shirts? Someone get the club soda, stat.

Clues:

— Ali’s visits are always chock full of spoilers, and tonight’s were no exception. We see she visited Toby in juvie to confront him about the “A” notes, but it appears he’s not yet part of the “A” team. So when does he actually join — and what pushes him over the edge? By the way, we may not like Toby anymore, but it’s hard not to get a little turned on by him in that do-rag.

— Who is Ali’s baby daddy? Might it be Wilden, who was seen holding that giant fish at Cape May? (When in doubt, blame the guy holding the giant fish.)  Ali also alludes to Toby having had a chance to kiss her — so we wonder how far those two went. Or perhaps one of Ali’s many, many other guys may have knocked her up. Translation: Somebody get Maury.

— We still wonder if Paige is on the “A” team, and now the fact that she might be cheating on Emily gives us more reason not to trust her. Perhaps Caleb’s idea to team up with her isn’t such a bright idea after all.

— Every time Detective Wilden (Bryce Johnson) pops back up, we assume he had something to do with Ali’s death — especially now that he might have had a fling with her. So watching the Liars voluntarily hand over the notebook to him makes us mighty nervous. Maybe Aria should have tossed it in the same fireplace as Ali's journal pages from last week.

Other Things That Need to Be Discussed:

— Is it just us, or did Hanna’s top with the bow tie on it look totally cute? It turns out that Blaine (Darren Criss) from Glee isn’t the only person who looks good in a bow tie. 

— Based on how unbelievably long it took Spencer to fix her makeup before meeting that private investigator, we were convinced she was preparing for a romantic rendezvous. So we’re relieved that the strange man she was meeting was a private eye and not who we first thought he was: A male prostitute. (Not that there’s anything wrong with having needs, Spence.)