Always take the stairs! In this week’s of Pretty Little Liars (Season 3, Episode 19: “What Becomes of the Broken-Hearted?), Aria (Lucy Hale) keeps it in the family, Spencer (Troian Bellisario) has a unique way to wish Mona (Janel Parrish) luck at the debate, and Caleb's (Tyler Blackburn) dad is as fond of swiping money as Hanna's (Ashley Benson) mom is. Perhaps they’re meant for each other!
Wherein Aria Gives the Little Bro a Shot
We’re guessing Team Wesria is quite happy after this week’s shocking Wes-Aria developments. Aria can’t possibly be choosing Little Fitz over Big Fitz, can she? Sure, Wes can recite poetry, and he’s cute — and Aria’s two weaknesses appear to be poetry and cute boys. But we’re still kinda creeped out by Wes — not to mention that, uh, Ezra (Ian Harding) is Ezra. ‘Nuff said.
Unfortunately, Wes and Aria were too busy playing tonsil hockey (which is the one sport Aria is good at) to realize CeCe (Vanessa Ray) is trouble. CeCe bails on their photo shoot and tells Aria her car got towed when it clearly didn't. So what was she up to — and was she maybe trying to get Aria and Wes to hook up in order to break up Ezria? If so, we hate CeCe more than ever.
Wherein Emily Realizes There Are More Reasons to Prefer the Stairs Than Just For Exercise
All the Liars have been through a staggering amount of messed-up crap. But we especially feel for Emily (Shay Mitchell), who — after going through the Nate and Maya stuff — now has to watch as Jason (Drew Van Acker) almost plummet to his death. Thankfully, Emily got out of the escalator in the nick of time — so did “A” let her get off of it? And is Jason in fact getting targeted because of the N.A.T. Club?
Now, Jason is missing from his hospital bed — and the pic of Ali (Sasha Pieterse) with CeCe and Detective Wilden (Bryce Johnson) at Cape May is gone, too. Bummer. Clearly, CeCe was lying about not knowing Wilden — so did CeCe have a fling with Wilden, as Jason suggests? Between that, and Jason spotting CeCe with Melissa on the night of Ali’s murder, CeCe is striking us as more than just a little suspicious.
Wherein Spencer Does to Mona What We’ve All Been Wanting to Do to Her
Unless you’re a hardcore Wesria supporter (which we can’t say we are), the best moment of the episode was unquestionably when Spencer lunges at Mona’s throat while making some sort of high-pitched squealing sound which we would have assumed can only be produced by dolphins. Note to self: Never kick Spencer off of any team, no matter what.
But the good thing about Spencer losing her spot on the team was Andrew and Spencer taking part in the hottest stripping game ever — or at least, the hottest stripping game to involve the words “Peloponnesian War.” Can Spence teach us how to take a bra off like that? With scenes involving Spandrew and Wrencer, Spencer is clearly on the verge of getting her groove back.
Wherein Hanna Learns Why You Shouldn’t Meddle In Other People’s Family Lives
Hanna may have been a tad too hasty in assuming Caleb’s dad can change overnight. Hanna’s mom may have encouraged Pastor Ted to hook Jamie up with a job fixing the church, but Jamie doesn’t appear interested in learning new tricks, as he steals from the church’s collection box. Who knew Hanna's meddling would have a downside?
Then again, we’re not complaining about Hanna helping Caleb, since it led to one of the hottest Caleb kisses we’ve ever seen! Okay, so the fact that it was in a church made it slightly less hot, but still. And can Hanna really judge Jamie, considering her own mom stole cash from the bank? We think there’s something in the Bible about glass houses, but we could be mistaken.
— Oh, CeCe. We knew you were sketchy, but we’re truly impressive by how sketchy. First, she lies to Aria about her car getting stolen, either because she had some “A” business to attend to, or she wanted Wes and Aria to hook up. (Maybe she likes Ezra? Who can blame her!) Plus, did she steal that Cape May pic — and did she and Melissa kill Ali? Like we said, that's a lot of sketchiness for one person.
— Poor Jason! The cutie takes quite a spill in that elevator — and along with that wound on his side a few episodes back, the guy is falling apart. So where did Jason go at the end of the episode? It’s possible he was kidnapped by “A” — or did he bail voluntarily? If “A” did kidnap Jason, then he’s approximately the 3,278th person to be kidnapped by “A.” That deserves a medal or something, right?
— We’re not ones to complain about getting to stare at Wren's (Julian Morris) lovely face. Still, we’re wondering why he was checking in on Spencer — and whether this is a sign he’s working with Mona and the “A” team. We’ve long suspected Wren was in cahoots with Mona, considering he’s working at Radley. But what did he actually accomplish by visiting Spencer this week? Very strange.
— C'mon, people — we don’t know Wes well enough to trust him. So even though he’s adorable, we’re worried he might be working with his mom to get Ezra and Aria to break up. See, Aria — this is why you don’t take more than one dip in the same gene pool.
Other Things To Be Discussed:
- Are we suddenly supposed to trust Pastor Ted? We refuse to forget how sketchy he seemed when he was dating both Hanna’s mom and Aria’s mom last year. So maybe he put that money in Jamie’s wallet to set him up? Not likely, but we’re not willing to give Ted a free pass just yet.
- It is just us, or has Spencer been acting kind zombie-like for the past few weeks? Then again, we’re kind of liking this new Zombie Spencer. Maybe she can find love with the zombie guy in the new movie Warm Bodies?
- Is it just a coincidence that Spencer got a message on a pair of sunglasses? Hmm... who do we know who is a big fan of sunglasses? In other words, we’ve got our eyes on you, Jenna. (Get it — “eyes”? Because she was blind?)
Catch the next episode of Pretty Little Liars on Tuesday, February 19, 2013 at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC Family.