Talk about a crazy, action-packed episode! The first Pretty Little Liars episode after the hiatus was full of surprises, including the repercussions of a car crash, tons of boy drama, and a potentially drug-induced hallucination. (Of course, for Lindsay Lohan, that would all be part of just another day.) So here’s what happened:
- Hanna, who had been hit by a speeding car at Mona’s camping party last time, awakens in a hospital with a cast on her leg. It looks like tracking down “A” is even more dangerous than starring in the new Spiderman musical on Broadway.
- Aria and Ezra’s secret is a secret no longer! Hanna tells the girls that is was Noel who wrote “I see you” on Ezra’s car window. Noel then confesses to Aria that he was spying on her and Ezra, but he promises to keep it to himself. (We’re guessing Noel won’t be voting for Ezra for “Teacher of the Year.”)
- Ian and Melissa Hastings get hitched! Say what?! Not only did Ian once hook up with Spencer, but he was the last person known to see Alison. Melissa’s decision-making ability is now in serious doubt, much like the decision-making of anyone who voluntarily chooses fruit for dessert.
- Emily is out of the closet! Her dad is concerned that she’s been trying to contact Toby in jail, so she tells him that she’s gay, which he seems to take better than Emily’s mom does. Then again, that’s not saying much!
- With Hanna still on the mend, Lucas sneaks into her room with orchids while she’s sleeping and kisses her. (Restraining order alert!) The next day, he returns with pudding (for some reason), but Hanna lets him down gently — which Lucas should have seen coming. Lucas expecting Hanna to fall for him is sorta like Vin Diesel preparing an Oscar acceptance speech.
- Hanna has plenty of visitors — including her mom and Mona — but the weirdest is Alison! It’s not clear if Alison is still alive or a drug-induced vision, but she says that the four girls know more than they realize about her disappearance, and then mentions that “A” is annoying. Of course, saying “A” is annoying is like saying that pancakes are delicious. (Read: no one will argue with you.)
- Spencer takes Aria to the tree that someone had carved "Alison + Ian" into, but the tree has since been chopped down (and we later see it burning in a fireplace)! Somewhere, Teddy Roosevelt just shed a single tear.
- The end of the episode reveals that “A” has written on Hanna’s cast! (In fact, her leg has more signatures than Mann’s Chinese Theatre in Hollywood.) Meanwhile, Ezra leaves his classroom late at night, with Noel following him to his car. Sounds like a fight for Aria’s love!
Wow! We need to catch our breath and relax after all that insanity. Come to think of it, we could use some comfort food. Anyone up for pancakes?