Enough about who killed whom — let’s talk about the guys! Each of the four main girls is involved in their own love triangle, and it’s hard to know who she’ll end up with. Have no fear! We’ve figured out who is right for each of the girls. (We know — thinking about a bunch of cute guys is a tough job, but someone had to do it.)
1. Who Should Aria Choose: Ezra or Noel?
We want what we can't have, ahem, Ezra: Deciding whether Aria should end up with Ezra is like trying to decide whether to have one more slice of pizza. You know it’s not good for you, but you still want it. And who are we to argue with that kind of logic?
When a perfect smile turns creepy, ahem, Noel: Noel is not a bad consolation prize. He’s hot, plays the guitar, and knows how to throw a party. But as we’ve seen the past two weeks, he seems to be a bit hotheaded. And we need another hotheaded guy on this show about as much as we need another Meet the Parents sequel.
THE WINNER: Ezra (Duh!)
2. Who Should Emily Choose: Maya or Toby?
Playing for Maya's team: She’s feisty — which of course we like — but is also surprisingly capable of rolling with the punches, as seen this week when she prepares for dinner at Emily’s place. And she and Emily might not have the best discretion when it comes to choosing a make-out spot (case in point: that photo booth), but at least Maya’s photogenic, right?
Good girls love bad boys, and Toby: It’s hard to say that Toby is ideal-boyfriend material. He’s spent time in the slammer, and his family issues are so bad that even Lindsay Lohan’s family would feel sorry for them. Sure, he’s got a sensitive side, but he’s also the least reliable of the guys on this show. In other words, if all the guys were airlines, Toby would be Delta.
THE WINNER: Maya (but this is by far the closest contest!)
3. Who Should Hanna Choose: Sean or Lucas?
Geek Chic is so hot right now, Lucas: Lucas is admirable in that he has remained persistent in his pursuit of Hanna, and continues to be resilient. Then again, the same thing could be said for a piece of gum that gets stuck to your shoe. Sure, Lucas is totally cute and “adorkable.” But we just don’t see how Hanna wouldn’t get bored with him.
What has Sean done for you lately: It’s perfectly fine for Sean to not want to put out with Hanna (not that we really understand where he’s coming from — has he seen Hanna?!). But when he’s not only not putting out but also seems to view her as just a status symbol, then there’s a problem.
THE WINNER: Neither! It’s time for some new contenders, and it looks like we've got one. Check out Caleb, the new bad boy in Rosewood.
4. Who should Spencer choose: Alex or Wren?
Alex has all the moves: Okay, so here’s the easiest contest yet. Alex is a sweetheart, has killer dance moves, and — most importantly — we love that hair! Finding fault with Alex is about as easy as finding fault with kittens.
Wren's accent and intelligence: This is possibly a moot point, as Wren has been M.I.A. from the show for what feels like decades now. And did anyone even think Spence and Wren were a match made in heaven? We’re guessing that about as many people were rooting for the two of them as saw that new Nicolas Cage witch movie this weekend. (Translation: Not many.)
THE WINNER: Wren (Just kidding!)