Forget the big football game and the Golden Globes — The Real Housewives of Atlanta was on, people. Let's do this!
Kimmy Get Your Gun
Kim Zolciak's man and new baby daddy, Kroy Biermann, takes her shopping, one of Kim's favorite activities! Just one twist: Kroy and Kim aren't in search of a new pair of earrings or stilettos. The couple is hunting for guns because Kroy feels that Kim needs to be able to protect herself... but who will protect the world from Kim?
After some impressive shooting practice, Kim settles for a 9 mm with an adorable pink handle. Let's hope it doesn't go off by accident around the Versace china... or, you know, one of the three young children in the household.
Later, the couple stops by Kim's psychic, Rose, who previously predicted that Kim would have a bouncing boy. This time, she lets Kim know that there's another bundle on the way soon, a little girl who she will not be able to carry full-term. Her advice? Stop worrying and eat some nutritious food. Rose also informs Kim that her marriage to Kroy will be of the til-death-do-you-part variety — how fascinatingly rare!
Cynthia and Phaedra Double Date
After the infamous scene that took place at Kim's baby shower, Phaedra Parks and Cynthia Bailey decide to get their husbands together via a double date so that Peter and Apollo can make nice, which they do. The couples talk about the challenges of marriage for a bit, before Phaedra drops the bomb that she's planning to take a trip to South Africa and she wants all the ladies to join her.
As soon as she's out the restaurant door, Cynthia calls NeNe Leakes to share the news and invite her, but NeNe claims she "wouldn't go to a trash can with them." We'll see.
Kandi Gets Her Groove On... Or Tries To
Kandi Burruss is definitely in for the trip to the motherland. In fact, in her quest to drop some pounds, she gets the mood started early by taking an African dance class with Phaedra. Kandi claims she's not a dancer... and girl ain't kidding. Talk about zero rhythm! Phaedra's got it going on, though! Both women have a great time, regardless.
After class, they gossip over some recently-leaked pictures of Marlo Hamptom's multiple mug shots. Apparently, Marlo tried to stab someone back in the day. Kandi better watch her back!
Nene and Mr. Big
Once again, NeNe meets with her new business partner, John Kolaj, and, once again, he acts inappropriately and lavishes her with extravagant gifts. Except this time, there are other people present at the meeting, so the behavior is even more embarrassing. Anyway, he gives her an amazing pair of Loubies, which make her giggle uncontrollably for the rest of the scene.
Also, NeNe has started referring to John as Mr. Big, not for his height but because of his big pockets. FYI, NeNe, John Kolaj is no Chris Noth.
Day at the Museum
Phaedra invites Sheree Whitfield to the Apex Museum — an awesome facility that presents history from an African-American perspective — for a private tour. She also sees it as the perfect setting to invite Sheree on her South African excursion. Sheree's all about it... until she hears that NeNe may be going, as well. In the end, though, she concludes that she would not pass on such a great experience just because of her beef with NeNe, and that they can all put their grown-woman panties on, go to Africa, be mature, and have a good time.
Now we just need NeNe to actually get on board... otherwise this trip is going to be pretty boring.
Most Awkward Dinner Ever
Considering Mama Joyce hasn't hung out with the girls since the ReDICKulous incident, Kandi decides to throw a small dinner party to get everyone together. And, we mean, everyone... as in Kim and Nene everyone.
Things are already a bit tense after Sheree walks in and greets everyone but NeNe, but it's downright chilly in the room when Kim enters stage right. What was meant to be a fun get-together with Joyce and the ladies turns into a lecture about how they're acting like schoolchildren instead of women.
Mama Joyce then forces Kim and Sheree to say hi to NeNe and vice versa. Kim finally does it, Sheree actually genuinely does it, but NeNe just says "Hiiii" without looking either one in the eye. So awkward. And, Mama Joyce didn't stop there. She kept pushing how upset it makes her to see that Kim and NeNe won't even talk to each other anymore.
Finally, NeNe straight up says that her and Kim won't ever be friends again, and Kim agrees, likening her ending with NeNe to a divorce.
To wrap up the incredibly uncomfortable evening, Mama Joyce discovers that she's been drinking alcohol all night. Well, that explains a few things.