When life gives you lemon trees, make lemonade throw a dinner party — but not a frou-frou one! In this week’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, we learn that Kyle Richards isn’t a fan of bees, being a trumpet player doesn’t mean you can’t Botox, and Yolanda Foster’s butler gets around.
The episode, “Don’t Sing for Your Supper,” begins with Kim Richards helping her daughter Kimberly prepare for her prom with a salad that no one appears to want. As Kimberly’s makeup artist points out, Kim seems more freaked out about the prom than Kimberly is. But that’s just how moms are, isn’t it?
Kimberly’s 20-year-old date, Nick, arrives, and Kim says that he’s a man, and then she grunts, because apparently Kim bases her idea of men from old Home Improvement episodes. (More power.) Still, it’s hard not to be touched when Kim tears up as she sees Kimberly drive away. Don’t worry, Kim — we’ll come over right now to share that salad with you!
Yolanda meets with her caterer/butler/British guy Richard to go over the menu for her upcoming dinner party. We’re impressed to see the care that Yolanda puts into preparing for it — so many tulips! — and it’s nice that Yolanda takes pride in everything she does. But did she really need to tell us twice that her home is 12,000 square feet? One time would have sufficed.
Kyle decides to take her life into her own hands help teach her daughter Alexia to parallel park, and let’s just say that emergency brake-loving Alexia could use a little practice. Kyle confesses that she loses five pounds every time she drives with Alexia (awesome diet plan!), but hey — at least Alexia didn’t leave the car because of a bee, as Kyle once did as a teenager.
“Now Where Did I Put My Grammys? Oh, There They Are!”
It’s now time to prepare for Yolanda’s, as Kyle tells Lisa Vanderpump that Paul is especially peeved at her. And then we get to see this firsthand, as Adrienne Maloof, Paul, and Kim all ride to the party together, and Paul says that he was very insulted by Lisa’s comments at the reunion. He then says he would turn down Lisa’s two kisses, which sounds somewhat Godfather-esque.
The guests start to arrive, and immediately Kyle recognizes that Yolanda’s butler is the same guy who has worked at Camille Grammer’s dinner party, which makes him a bad omen. Kyle was then on a roll tonight, as she teases Yolanda for her see-through and color-coordinated (!) refrigerator, and then she impersonates Chris Botti, the Botoxed trumpet player. Go, Kyle!
Lisa arrives and greets everyone, but Paul gets upset that Lisa doesn’t say anything to him or Adrienne. Paul describes his feelings to Kyle using an expletive, and Kyle puts it perfectly when she describes Paul as an emotional man. Like we said, she was on a roll. Things are also tense as Taylor Armstrong brings up Brandi Glanville’s sex comment from two weeks ago. Note to Taylor: Time to let it go.
It’s now time for Yolanda’s husband David to make his entrance. He tells the guests how much Yolanda makes his life better, which is very sweet. He also appears to have forgotten Taylor’s name, even though she’s good friends with his ex-wife.
We see that David keeps his bajillion Grammys on top of his piano, and he tells Kyle that it’s Yolanda’s idea to keep them there, not his. Still, we have a feeling that, when Yolanda said she wanted to keep them there, his response was probably how you’d respond to someone offering you a ride to the airport. Like, “Oh, that’s not necessary. Then again, if you insist...”
Kyle asks David for the name of his favorite song that he’s written, and David is suddenly as happy as a little kid on Christmas. He runs over to the piano and plays his song from Urban Cowboy, with his friend Michael Johns from American Idol (what the?!) singing vocals.
Seen and Not Heard
Kyle loves the song, and then she wants to hear something that she can sing. She starts belting out “Amazing Grace,” but David apparently thought it was more like “Mediocre Grace,” as he scoffs at the idea that non-professional singers would keep the more experienced ones from singing. “You don’t speak, you don’t sing,” is his friendly suggestion to the ladies.
At this point things are getting tense, as Taylor is shown continuing to down the white wine and doesn’t seem thrilled that this sing-along seems to have more rules than a bridge game. They start playing “Danny Boy” and she gets even more annoyed that David is playing such a sad, funeral-esque song.
So Paul stands up for Taylor and suggests that David change the tune. But Yolanda resents having her husband treated like a jukebox, and so she decides to call it a night. Taylor is irritated by this, but given the tension that was simmering under the surface between Adrienne and Lisa, it was probably a good call to end the party when Yolanda did.
Finally, we see Lisa telling Ken that, because things were so awkward at Yolanda’s party, she’s meeting up with Adrienne to hash things out. However, if Lisa doesn’t hear an apology, she tells Ken that the meeting will be shorter than Adrienne is (best quote of the night!). And speaking of Ken, why does it seem as though several of the husbands are more invested in the arguments than the ladies are?
So we see Lisa arrive to the meeting, but we won’t find out how it goes until next time. The suspense!
Overall, this episode was a lot of fun, and it was a testament to most of the ladies that things remained civil at Yolanda’s. (Sorry, Taylor — you aren’t one of the ladies we’re referring to.) And the first half of the episode was especially fun, as it’s great to see the ladies sharing milestones with their daughters. We’re just glad we’re not the ones who own the cars that were parked immediately in front of and behind Alexia’s car.
So now we can’t wait to see what next week’s meeting between Lisa and Adrienne brings. In the meantime, we could use a drink. If only we had a bottle of wine from Oprah.