Credit: Bravo Photo: Lisa Vanderpump Gives a Lap Dance in Season 2, Episode 15, "A Book, a Bachelorette, and a Breakdown"

We love all the ladies on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, but no one quite has a way with a one-liner like Lisa Vanderpump. Somehow, we’ve managed to narrow down her 10 funniest quips of Season 2. And don’t forget to check out our Top 10 Season 2 Quotes from the rest of the women (or perhaps even revisit Lisa’s Top 20 Season 1 Quotes, if you’re feeling nostalgic!).

10. Apparently, Lisa won’t be asking Cedric for life advice anytime soon. (Episode 17: “Leis and Lies in Lanai”)
Lisa: Cedric wants to be a life coach? More like a life roach.

9. We’ve all been there, right? (Episode 20: “The Real Wedding of Beverly Hills”)
Lisa [about Pandora’s wedding]: If she wanted me to wear my knickers on my head, I’d wear it — wouldn’t be the first time.

8. Lisa apparently puts a high value on her feet. (Episode 14: “Malibu Beach Party from Hell”)
Lisa [to Kevin Lee, about the “million-dollar” wedding]: You’re gonna get a million-dollar foot up your a**.

7. Lisa wants Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones to track down Kim. (Episode 17: “Leis and Lies in Lanai”)
Lisa: Kim — where is she? In fact, what planet is she on — let’s be honest!

6. If we were Max, we would make sure to find a urinal every time from now on. (Episode 6: “Let the Games Begin”)
Lisa [about reprimanding a child for public peeing]: Now, if it was Max, I would yank him by the thing.

Credit: Bravo © NBC Universal, Inc. Photo: Kyle Richards and Lisa Vanderpump in Season 2, Episode 18, "A Day Late, an Apology Short"

5. We’re thinking Adrienne might not take her up on this. (Episode 13: “Adrienne’s Fashion Show”)
Lisa: I’m sorry about the bachelorette party — truly sorry — but I have a lot of dodgy relatives coming in at Christmas. Maybe she’d like to host that?

4. Uh... no comment. (Episode 2: “Blame It on the Altitude”)
Lisa: Is Beaver Creek ready for these creaky beavers?

3. Let’s just hope Giggy doesn’t try to chase it. (Episode 20: “The Real Wedding of Beverly Hills”)
Lisa [to son Max, about his mohawk]: Not with that thing on your head — it looks like a squirrel.

2. Lisa thinks Brandi needs a pit stop. (Episode 17: “Leis and Lies in Lanai”)
Lisa: Brandi’s, like, out of control. I actually think the gas tank in her brain is running on empty right now.

1. No soup for Lisa! (Episode 6: “Let the Games Begin”)
Lisa [about game night]: If I had gone, I probably would have felt I was, like, drowning in a bimbo soup.

 

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