Credit: FayesVision/WENN.com Photo: Kyle Richards and Mauricio Umansky Arrive at the FRILOGY.com Launch on December 3, 2010
The only tough thing about choosing the ten craziest, most inane quotes from this week’s episode is narrowing it down to only ten! Here are our picks for the best quotes from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Episode 1.8.

10. Too much information

Camille: After you’ve been married for a while, you don’t do it *anywhere* — sorry!

9. Details, details


Kim: Everybody’s making me out to be this really bad person!
Kyle: No, not a bad person... just rude.

8. Russell might need to hire a bodyguard from now on

Kickboxing trainer (as Taylor punches him): You thinking about someone on that?
Taylor: I’ll never tell!

7. Get a room already, you two

Camille: Is it hot in here, or is it me? I’m just sitting next to Nick — that’s what it is!

6. We’re sensing some sarcasm here

Lisa: I really wanted Kim to phone Martin and to thank him for driving her home because it was a long way from Mohamed’s house and she wasn’t capable of driving. Maybe she’d had... well, “one” drink too many.

5. Kyle’s not ready to go all the way

Kyle (about her bikini wax): I was thinking, like, a Dorothy Hamill cut. I do not want the Telly Savalas — I’m gonna tell you that right now.

4. As it turns out, the DMV is not the best place to find eligible bachelors

Weird old guy at the DMV: How many fingers am I holding up?
Lisa: Not as many as I’ll be holding up in a minute.

3. We’re guessing that Kyle doesn’t want Kim’s advice!

Kim (about bringing the kids to Napa): Well, I would take them, personally.
Kyle: Yeah, but look what that’s gotten you!

2. Lisa knows what she’s good at

Lisa (about her driving test): My shirt’s undone. I told you, that’s the only [chance] I’ve got at passing!

1. This is a much more effective abstinence method

Mauricio (on what happens if they have another kid): I chop off the wiener after this thing.