True Blood Recap: Season 6, Episode 5 — “F*** the Pain Away”
Credit: HBO/John P. Johnson    

True Blood

True Blood Recap: Season 6, Episode 5 — “F*** the Pain Away”

We said it last week, and we’ll say it again — True Blood is back, folks! Anyone who thought the convoluted storylines were getting tired has gotten a jolt to the heart the last couple of weeks. Like Red Bull on an empty stomach, tonight’s episode was fueled with action, from Sookie throwing a faerie fireball at Benlow at the beginning to Sookie’s dad, who had taken over Lafayette’s body, trying to drown her at the end. Oh. My. Godric.

Sookie and Benlow: It’s a love story, baby just say yes.

Hold on to your Warlow-hating hats, folks — it looks like we have a budding love story on our hands instead of a super scary otherworldly killing machine. Alas, Benlow declared his love for Sookie and she nearly believes him... already. That didn’t take much. In order to find out if her B.S. detector is on the fritz, she asked Lafayette to summon her parents in order to find out if Warlow’s claim that Sookie’s parents tried to kill her was true. Spoiler alert: it was! Of course, they thought they were doing the right thing, but still. In the end, Daddy Stackhouse tried to finish what he started — by taking over Lafayette’s body, Whoopi-Goldberg-in-Ghost-style. We’ll see where this leads us next week, but we have the oh-so-sneaking suspicion Warlow will come to save the day.

Warlow: The Early Days

True Blood Recap: Season 6, Episode 5 — “F*** the Pain Away”
Credit: HBO/John P. Johnson    

We find out the story behind Warlow after an intense scene in which Lilith comes across the fae while he’s at the water’s edge. They share a quick romp before she turns him into a vampire. He leaves his village for years and, upon return, he can’t control himself, so he ravages the whole village. He does spare, Niall, however, who was only a baby at the time. Oh, the irony!

Frustrated at his turn of fate and fueled by his loathing of the vampire within, Warlow kills his maker, Lilith, with his faerie fireball. In present-day Bon Temps, she isn’t dead, though — not fully. After Benlow admits his feelings for Sookie, Bill Compton — under her power — commands Ben as his maker to come with him so he can synthesize his blood. Obivously, Ben is none too pleased and takes scientist Hido Takahashi hostage.

Another One Bites the Faerie Dust

Sheriff Andy Bellefleur got our tear ducts started with a super emotional scene in which he discovers the bodies of his dead faerie daughters. There was a lone survivor, however, who was hanging on by a thread. She was snatched up by Daddy and promptly given a dose of vampire blood. When she was awoken, she spilled the beans that it was Jessica who made them bite the faerie dust. He swears revenge on Bill, who he holds responsible, but Holly talks some sense into the mourning sheriff.

Jason “Defiled” Sarah Newlin With His “Vampire-Loving Pecker” (Her Words, Not Ours)

True Blood Recap: Season 6, Episode 5 — “F*** the Pain Away”
Credit: John P. Johnson/HBO    

After being rejected by the governor — which she reacted to by saying, “When a woman comes to you in black lingerie, you unwrap her!” — Sarah decided to revisit an old notch on her bedpost: Jason Stackhouse. Having the best one-liners of the night, Sarah told him, “God wants me to f—k you,” and, man, did they go to town. Naked Stackhouse alert! Afterwards, however, a guilt-ridden Jessica came to bend Jason’s ear, confessing to everything she did to the faeries and how she was “turned on” the whole time. They talked about love, we swooned, and then Sarah called the AVL on Jess and had her taken away to Vamp Camp. Moment: ruined.

Alcide Goes Sniffing Around

We’re not digging the werewolf storyline as much this season but it will likely get good in an episode or two. For now, Alcide was shown sniffing around for Sam Merlotte and Nicole Wright when his dad insulted him by implying that he was trying to impress his latest bitch. A fight ensued and Pop asked for money. Later, Pop noticed Sam and Nicole in a bit of an argument, so we’re wondering what he’s going to do with that information — help them, or turn them over to the pack. He doesn’t seem to have much loyalty to the pack these days, so we’re guessing he helps them escape.

Pam vs. Eric

True Blood Recap: Season 6, Episode 5 — “F*** the Pain Away”
Credit: HBO/Video Still    

Pam was seen getting her head shrunk, as the AVL is trying to figure out what makes the Cold Ones tick. She wasn’t giving anything away, telling them vampires don’t care for each other and don’t care about killing each other — it’s humans that thrive on their pain. When push came to shove, however, and the Newlins teamed up to pit maker against progeny, you could see and feel Eric and Pam’s love and affection for each other. Sarah chimes in, “Haven’t you seen Gladiator? F—king fight!” We’re very intrigued, as theirs has been a complicated relationship as of late and it looks like, on next week’s episode, the fight may just begin after all when Pam finds out Eric created a new baby vamp in Willa. Let the Hunger Games begin!

Speaking of Willa, the governor’s daughter was interned, just like the others, so there goes the plan for making the governor see the vampires’ more human side. She finds out quickly there will be no special treatment, as the guard who locks her up tells her, “I scratch your back, you lick my balls.”

We can’t be sure but, with only four episodes left in this shortened season, we think the highly anticipated death occurs next week, or perhaps the following week. Oh, the dread. The anticipation. The agony of waiting another week to find out what happens! It’s torturous to be a Truebie right about now.

Did you watch Sunday’s episode of True Blood? What did you think? Sound off in the comments below!

07.14.2013 / 12:00 AM EDT by Marnie Brodersen
Related: True Blood, Recaps

Share on Facebook0Share on Google+0Tweet about this on Twitter0