Look, Revengers, there’s a big death coming up and we know that a central character is on his or her way to being dunzo. Wouldn't it be great if it was someone we didn’t really care about?
Revenge writers, if you’re listening, we have some suggestions. There are the obvious choices like Nate and Kenny Ryan, but those are givens. Here are five key characters whose funerals we wouldn’t mind attending this season.
1) Amanda Clarke
It’s not like we have a huge problem with Stripper Mandy these days. Homegirl gave birth to the most precious child ever and even continues to help out our girl Emily Thorne. But her character seems to have run her course. Plus, Jack would make a seriously hot single dad.
2) Declan Porter
No one should be shocked by this pick. Declan’s got so much hemp on the brain that he can’t even properly rob mansions. He’s gotten Jack sent to jail and was semi-responsible for Charlotte’s overdose. His death would really help our favorite Hamptonites stay out of harm’s way.
3) Padma Lahari
Nolan’s lover-turned-evil-spy is pretty lame. We had no respect for her until we learned she was a secret agent, but now we’re ready for her to head out so Nolan and Emily can finally get together (the way David Clarke intended).
4) Kara Wallace Clarke
We can probably all agree that the Kara storyline didn’t work this season. This deranged mommy not-so-dearest was a little too coo coo bananas for us, and it’s not like Emily really wanted to be associated with her after she remembered that Kare Bear tried to drown her as a child.
5) Satoshi Takeda
Remember that time when Emily and Aiden had a top-secret Japanese sensei? If the answer is “no,” you’re not alone. Takeda shows up at the strangest times and rarely improves a situation (like anyone actually wanted Tyler to die). Maybe it’s time to take him (and his rat tail) out of the picture.
Do you agree with our picks? Tell us below!