full size Victoria Examines Charlotte's Eyes in Season 1, Episode 22: "Reckoning"
Credit: ABC

The promo for the season finale of Revenge is 30 jam-packed seconds full of accusations, tears, bitch slaps, and axe-murderers.

If you watched it and still feel like you have no idea why Charlotte hasn't overdosed on pills yet, fear not. We’ve parsed through each millisecond of promo content and created a detailed analysis of what’s to come!

0:01 – Emily Pays a Visit to Someone's House ... Could It Be The White-Haired Man?!

Someone really needs to ask this dude what his name is.

0:02 – Flashback to David Clarke Getting Stabbed in Slow Motion

Sigh, prison riots. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em –– because you'll just get shivved in the shower anyway.

0:03 – Emily Walks Into Nolan's House, Crazy Camera Angles Abound

He's not there, Em. And neither are his bangs.

0:04 – Daniel Finds Emily's Hidden Camera

Time to settle down and watch a 15-hour sex tape.

0:05 – Conrad and Lydia Kiss, Everyone Shudders

Almost as creepy as the time Victoria stroked her de Kooning like it was a person.

0:06 – Victoria Bitch-Slaps Daniel, We LOL

We love how the editors have managed to include this scene in every promo for the last three weeks.

0:07 – Charlotte Claps Her Hand Over Her Mouth in Horror

Probably just remembered that she breathed the same air as someone from Yonkers.

0:09 – Emily Attacks Someone .... With An Axe?

Cut to Daniel watching "So I Married An Axe Murderer."

0:11 – Charlotte Says "Something Terrible Has Happened"

You mean, other than the fact that your dad's a terrorist, your other dad's a murderer, your BF hates you, and you're a drug addict?

0:12 – Victoria Steps Out of a Car While Epic Music Plays

Looks like she's taking a trip down Love Lane with her buddy from the SEC!

0:13 – Daniel Looks Evil Because Apparently He's a Terrible Person

Sob, the title says it all.

0:14 – Conrad Visits Victoria, Seems Angry

What else is new?

0:15 – Emily Falls Backwards While Smelling Something ... May or May Not Be Dead

Don't worry, she's probably just huffing a lobster bib.

0:17 – Conrad Opens His Trunk ...

Trying to figure out how many dead bodies he can fit in it.

0:18 – Someone Burns a Photo of Victoria and Lydia

Considering that Emily has a history of pyromania, we think this is all her.

0:20 – Daniel Accuses Emily of Cheating!

Sigh, Ashley is such a snitch with a capital B.

0:21 – Victoria Recoils From Conrad's Touch

Understandable.

0:22 – Jack Opens a Drawer

"Ahhh, hello hoodies. My sweet friends."

0:22 – Hand Flops Over, Spills a Bunch of Pills

They've been teasing us with this image for three promos in a row. At this point, we're starting to think it's not gonna happen.

0:23 – Emily Says "Tell Jack I Love Him"

Tears of happiness!

Credit: YouTube
Video:
Revenge Season Finale Promo: "If I Don't Make It Out of This ..." (VIDEO)

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