Fans of Teen Mom have been dying to check back in with everyone's favorite jailbird, Amber Portwood. The former reality star was released from prison back in November after serving 17 months of her five-year prison sentence. Well, our prayers have finally been answered, because MTV took fans behind the scenes with Miss Portwood during her one-off special, Being Amber.

First up, Amber's life has changed dramatically since her release from jail. She no longer is BFFs with the mysterious mythical creature known as Sugarfoot, she no longer styles her hair with melted Jolly Ranchers, and she no longer is addicted to Fentanyl patches. But life post-prison isn't a walk in the park. Not only did Amber have to readjust to being in the public eye, she also had to reacclimate to being a mom to Leah, who's a lot older now than she was when Amber went to jail!

So, what about Amber's relationship with her baby daddy, watermelon farmer Gary Shirley? Turns out she still loves this dude and the feeling isn't mutual. But even worse? Amber admitted that she often feels compelled to use drugs — which isn't uncommon for recovering addicts. "I've f—ing been wanting to get high all day, since I woken up this morning. I swear to god," Amber told a friend during a moment of candor. "Being free is so much different than being in prison and being sober... It's just so hard! I'm always gonna have triggers, I'm always gonna wanna get high. That's never gonna go away. My best way to cope right now is hanging out with family."

While we have faith in the Teen Mom Gods that Amber will stay on the wagon, sobriety is an uphill battle. Hopefully Amber will spend tons of time with her family to help her stay on track!

P.S. Gary wore a chef's hat throughout much of this episode. Fantasy just turned into reality.

What did you think of Amber's special? Weigh in below.