Credit: Instagram Photo: Jaclyn Swartz Poses in Classy Leather Like a Boss

Let’s face it, guys: The holidays are here, and sometimes that means that a weird little switch goes off in girls’ heads and makes them do crazy things. No, that doesn’t mean they get all baby-crazy or wanna get married or whatever sexist thing you’re thinking. Stop that. We’re talking about sequins, and Bachelor Pad’s Jaclyn Swartz is here to be your spirit guide.

You know you’ve been guilty of this fashion faux pas: You’re getting ready for a night out with your gals, or trying to make a splash at your holiday party. Instead, you look like a disco ball at best, a pro at worst. Lucky for us, we have Jaclyn to keep it on the court. Here, she talks to Wetpaint Entertainment, sharing her best advice for looking great without going over the top.

The PERFECT answer to every office holiday party is not dressing like a hooker,” Jax shares in her classically candid way. “Coworkers can be catty, and they will talk about what you are wearing. I do it to others all the time!”

Uh oh, so what should you wear when you wanna get the good kind of stares? “A great outfit is a wool skirt or dress, funky tights, booties, and accessories. I am telling you this because it’s exactly what I wore to mine, and it was a hit. The funky tights add some personality and flare to your otherwise boring outfit. The accessories spice things up and are also a great conversation starter. You’ll look classy and cool, but also like you have taste (even if you don’t).”

And just in case you were wondering, it’s totally fine to get hammered… well, sort of fine, according to Jaclyn, as long as you pull it together. “Make sure you drink water between your cocktails, because, let’s face it, no one (like me) can control  themselves at an open bar and the chances you black out are 110%. It’s entirely acceptable to bring in McDonald’s breakfast to work the next morning, but you better be there by 9am! Bitches like me are watching.”

But if you’re headed to a family party, something simple is best. Flat boots and patterned jeans are her recommendation, as they “keep you cozy and allow you to eat copious amounts of food” without threatening preggo questions from that nosy aunt.

Great tips, Jax! Man, if only we had her on TV every week to remind us how to be cool and classy on the reg. Hey, ABC, get on it!

Julia Wayne is an Editor at Wetpaint Entertainment. Follow her on Twitter and Google+!