Credit: ABC

WHOO WEE! Can you believe that the first episode of The Bachelor Season 17 is in the bag and Sean Lowe already cut Kaylee DeFer, Lady Gaga, and all sorts of other lookalikes? Poor Paige Vigil — homegirl got cut after just a few minutes with Sean. But for those of you keeping score at home, that makes almost an entire 15 minutes for the woman who seems like the most legitimately cool person who never got a chance at love or money (#projecting).

But we weren’t the only ones who got a big dose of crazy, a lot of slurring, some insane dancing, and several gorgeous and amazing girls. Bachelor Nation gave us all the gift of some inspired texts. Here’s a rundown of our favorite first impression... first impressions: