Former Bachelor contestant Natalie Getz has been following The Bachelorette all season long, and her blog series has given us brilliant insights, informed opinions, and plenty of LOLs. However, we couldn’t help but notice that she’s gotten a little exasperated with Emily Maynard’s guys. Her take on the “Men Tell All” special was that of a hostess with rowdy guests who’d overstayed their welcome — have a look!
On the intros:
Watching all the guys talk over each other to extend their 15 minutes, and in turn look like a bunch of bratty teenage girls is always comical. John [Wolfner] starts it off by trying to answer every question Chris Harrison has for them. Next, Travis [Pope] feels nervous without his egg and words begin to foam out of his mouth.
See what we mean? Natalie’s just about had it with these guys. But she’s really just getting started...
On Kalon McMahon:
Let’s get this straight. Kalon not only gets facials, he spray tans, gets Botox and definitely injects his lips. This is what I can tell alone from watching him on TV. He is more girly than most of my girlfriends. He tells Chris Harrison that if someone else arrived in a helicopter that he would be genuinely interested to hear their story. Barf!
On Ryan Bowers:
... the camera scans Ryan’s face and he is smiling and winking at the audience. He thinks he is so hot! He thinks this is a roast, but no, they are definitely straight up making fun of him. Even though this entire hodgepodge of all things Ryan is collective footage of him acting like a jerk off, Ryan still doesn’t get that people are making fun of his ego and stares at himself adoringly as the audience laughs. O.M.G.
On Tony Pieper:
Of course Tony runs up to give Emily a hug. Of course. This Muppet loving guy struck a nerve with me the second he signed on to Bachelor Pad 3. He cried like a little girl about how much he missed his son, and when a lot of people gave him shit, I stuck up for him. He left the Bachelorette, because he couldn’t handle being away from his son, which I thought was commendable at the time. But then…oh but then…he signs on to do the Bachelor Pad?!
Eventually Natalie calms down and collects herself — but all her frustrations with the other guys leave her with barely any sympathy for even the most recently heartbroken:
On Sean Lowe:
He speaks about how his heart was broken for the first time, and that he is glad his family has been such an awesome support. He is aching, but glad he knows what it feels like to be hurt. Yada lada shmada. Boring. Can we make fun of Kalon and Chris more, please? Sean is simply too normal to entertain me today. That’s a compliment;)