Do you ever wake up with that sinking feeling, the one where you realize that unless you’re Emily Maynard or Justin Bieber’s mom, you might never get the chance to reject Sean Lowe or Chris Harrison? Well, even though we can’t really help you with that, we can help you use the two hotties to reject some guys on your own.

How? Call it the second coming of Christmas, guys, because there is a Bachelor rejection hotline. Yep, you read that right. Sean and Chris are helping millions of people with their heartbreak, in a totally different way than you might expect. Now, when you meet a persistent Dbag, instead of just kneeing him in the groin (which we’ve totally never done), you can just give him a phone number and let the ABC boys do your dirty work.

It’s easy as a superfan on Bachelor Pad, guys. The number is 212-HEARTBR (or 212-432-7827), and when the poor reject calls it, Chris Harrison answers in his soothing, understanding, only slightly jaded voice. “I have some unfortunate news. Whoever gave you this number is trying to send you a message — and it’s not a good one: They don’t like you. No rose for you.”

The caller then has three options: if they press 1, Sean will tell them how much it “sucks” that this happened, before telling them that even though he was dumped in front of millions of people, at least he was never given a fake number.

Option 2 is by far the best, and includes Sean reciting a poem that is about as creative and rhyme-y as you would expect. We’re hoping based on this performance, there will be a poetry writing challenge on The Bachelor Season 17.

Lastly, option 3 allows the caller to enjoy a pep talk via the former football stud. We don’t want to ruin the surprise, but you might want to call it a few times, just for your own amusement. Besides, haven’t you always wanted to talk on the phone with these two hotties? Even if they are telling you to f*ck off? Us too.

Source: Entertainment Weekly