Michael “More Than Mah Beetus” Garofola is quickly becoming one of our favorite men ever shepherded into the Bachelorette fold. But just as we learned when “raising” those pet gerbils as a kid, sometimes we love things too hard and have trouble saying goodbye. Naturally, we want to know if Mike is gonna suffer the same fate and leave our fantasy world (The Bachelorette) before his time. Or, as Mom put it, “go away to summer camp.”
Despite that macabre thought process, we’re happy to say that we still have a few more weeks with the Florida-based Assistant US Attorney. That is, a few more weeks until we hunt him down in court, buy him a dozen rose boutonnieres, and tell him that while Desiree Hartsock may have dumped him on an island in Portugal, we would never do such a thing. (If we dumped him, it would totally be on, like, an island in an intersection. Because one way tickets are expensive.)
Oh, yeah, um, Des ditches Mike G. on the island of Madeira in Season 9, Episode 7. And you know what? We could list five bajillion places worse the strapping lad coulda been dumped. Like, for example, at the Olive Garden Des took James to in Atlantic City, for starters... (we woulda used the bottomless breadsticks to sop up our tears).
Are you shocked Michael doesn’t win Desiree’s heart in the end? Would you like to see him as the next Bachelor? Tell us your feels.
Source: Reality Steve