Credit: ABC

Desiree Hartsock has just started filming The Bachelorette Season 9, and is ankle-deep in the crazy love journey coming her way. And just like the eight ladies who came before her, there’s a lot she needs to think about as she searches for her husband on the ABC show. Like, uh, you know, pick the right guy, or something... For some much more articulate views than the ones we can offer (“Don’t let them meet your brother!”), we spoke exclusively with Season 6 Lady Rose Doler, Ali Fedotowsky.

Wetpaint Entertainment: Hey Ali, so did Des reach out to you? Or vice versa?
Ali Fedotowsky: No, actually. I sent her a direct message offering her help if she needed it, but I didn’t hear back, so I guess she didn’t need me!

Well, that was nice of you. Do you have advice you would have given her had she gotten back to you?
Yeah. If I were to tell her anything, it would be that she should demand to speak to her family on a regular basis. I didn’t get to talk to mine until the end, when they came to Tahiti, and it’s really stressful that way. You know, you’re cut off from the world and from the people you care about, and it just creates kind of a non-realistic environment.

That makes a lot of sense. Is there a reason you’re not allowed to talk to them?
Well, producers want you to make your own decision... but I think it would make a better show if families were a bigger part of the process. I think it would really help. They should do that. Or, you know, like get help from a psychologist or psychiatrist throughout.

What about Emily, who lived with her daughter and saw her family and even had her friends on the show — and it still didn’t work out!?
Well, yeah. Every season is different. But, okay, scratch what I just said. My advice is simple: Good luck, girly. [Your husband]’s either there, or he’s not.

There you have it, folks. Straight from the tell-it-like-it-is mouth of one of our favorite ladies ever to grace the small screen. What do you think — what advice would you give Desiree if you could help her? Sound off below.