Credit: ABC via WENN

David Good knows a thing or two about The Bachelor Pad, and even he is horrified by this season's sexplorations, betrayals, pickle penises, and drunken dry-humping. Monday's episode was even more deranged than usual (what with Ed face-planting into a pile of hot fudge), and David has beef. Three beefs, to be exact, and he's chronicled them in his Bachelor Pad blog.

Beef #1: Reid
"Man what the hell? I mean I have seen some back stabbing lying a$$holes in my day but dang man, your character really looked bad on here. Ed and Reid should have done what Kovacs and I did and teamed up. They already know each other and each other’s strengths from their previous show and could have taken control of this house. Ed was right when he said, “just don’t lie to me!” Talk about breaking mancode. "

Beef thoughts: While we agree that Reid broke the mancode, this is a game, and the dude was just trying to strategize!

Beef #2: Blakeley
"I liked Blakeley and her competitive fire on The Bachelor. I heard from a few of the girls on the show that she was a bitch but just thought it was girls being girls. Watching this however I am shocked at how brutally, overwhelming, controlling and straight up rude this girl is. I wonder what she is thinking watching herself on TV. Is it possible she does not see it like the rest of us?"

Beef thoughts: Blakeley really needs money, which might explain her 'tude. Give the girl a break, she just wants to stop waxing vaginas all day.

Beef #3 JAMIE STILL PURSUING CHRIS! 
"Ladies come on!!!!!!! This is so ridiculous and pathetic to watch. Unfortunately I see this all the time and not just on TV. Talking about marriage, families and babies??? What??? Can a guy be any more of a jerk than this? If he banged her aunt in front of her do you think she would still go after him like a lost puppy? Girl needs a wakeup call. I hope watching herself on TV is it."

Beed thoughts: Let's not forget that Jamie was drunk. So maybe her rant about the holidays wasn't that bad. Sigh, who are we kidding? Yes, it was.

Source: Warner Brothers