Credit: Michael Courtney/The CW ©2011 The CW Network Photo: Diana in Season 1, Episode 14: “Valentine”

Love was in the air in The Secret Circle Season 1, Episode 14, “Valentine,” so you can bet the quotes were bitter, drunken, and completely hilarious (looking at you, Adam). Check out the top 10 quips and snarks from “Valentine,” and don’t worry – passing out during Jake’s musings is completely normal!

10. Faye (Phoebe Tonkin) sasses Jake (Chris Zylka): “I wear slinky lingerie because I like feeling slinky.”
We wear grandma panties because... actually there’s no excuse.
 
9. Faye realizes it’s Valentine’s Day: “Oh, I completely forget it’s Anti-Independence Day.”
Otherwise known as National Chocolate Eating Day.

8. Jake chats with Adam (Thomas Dekker): “Coming, lover boy?”
Sigh... if only these two were lovers.

7. Jake yells at Cassie (Britt Robertson): “I choose you!”
Close your eyes and pretend he’s talking to you. Works every time.

6. Diana (Shelley Hennig) texts Cassie: “B*tch, hurry.”
We love this new and improved Lady Di!

5. Blazed Diana talks to Cassie: “You’re the most sacred witch in all the land!”
The sad part is it’s true.

4. Faye answers the door: “Did you sluts order another hot pizza guy?”
This girl.

3. Adam asks Cassie out: “You want to do something later? We could reminisce over any number of near-death topics.”
Aw, look at Adam trying to be funny.

2. Faye mocks Diana: “It’s a slumberparty. How may wardrobe changes were you planning?”
To be fair, you never know when you might accidentally light yourself on fire.

1. Diana goes boy-crazy: “Before the pizza guy gets here, we’re gonna do a spell to make him hot... And when he gets here, I’m gonna make out with him.”
Sounds like a typical Friday night.

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