Our heads are spinning! We’re still recovering from when Ben popped the question to Adrian in last week’s cray-cray good episode, and now there’s another proposal? Wow, talk about being ahead of the curve. If you were you too busy Googling “Does Daren Kagasoff have a gal pal?” to watch last night’s Secret Life eppy, fear not! We’ve got you covered with our OMG-worthy recap.
It’s a Nice Day for a White Wedding!
You guys, Adrian is becoming a total bridezilla. This girl’s riding the crazy-town express train, and only making occasional stops to pee and binge eat. In between bossing her friends around, terrifying her fiance, and planning her bridal party (Grace is maid of honor, duh!), Adrian could not be more excited about her wedding! Too bad we can’t say the same for Ben. This hubby-to-be is having a major white-wedding buzz-kill. Hmmm, wasn’t he super into getting hitched, like, five seconds ago? Ben loves to pop the question, but apparently he’s not so good at following through...
Ricky tries to convince Ben not to marry Adrian, but the sausage prince won’t back down, even though he’s bumming hard. He confides in Jack and Tom about his increasingly cold feet, and they remind him that he’s been married a million times before — it should be a breeze this time ‘round! Ben needs to sit back, chillax, and let Adrian work it!
But where are The Sausage Royals going to live? Don’t sweat it — the parental units band together to buy their kiddos a condo. OMG, so exciting! The downside? A big condo means a smaller wedding for Ben and Adrian... le sigh! We’re a little dissapointed, but Adrian couldn’t be happier and that’s all that matters. She’s totally embraced her pregnancy and is ready to get frisky with her baby daddy — except he wants to wait to do the deed until after they’re married! What the heck? Ben couldn’t keep his hands off that Italian floozy, and now he’s getting all moral on us? We have a feeling there’s something more to this. Like Ben’s secretly still in love with Amy. Just guessing!
Let’s Get It on!
Grace and Grant are home alone at last! No renties = the perfect time to sex it up. Or is it? Apparently not, ‘cause Grace has marriage fever! Watch out people, engagements are spreading around Grant High like nasty STIs! For realzies, what’s with these kids? They’re only 17! Grace will only let Grant into her panties if he’ll agree to marry her in the future, so he’s sexiled for now. But that doesn’t mean they can’t enjoy a PG-13 sleep-over. Awww, these two are so cute!
You've Got a Friend in Me
Time to check in on Amy’s besties! Lauren’s texting up a storm about Adrian’s wedding dramz when she gets interrupted by her stepfather, who casually let’s her know that he’s divorcing her mom. So sad! We hope Lauren’s OK, but considering that she barely reacts to the news, we have a feeling she’ll soldier through the rough times. Besides, she’s pretty distracted by the fatty check her ex-daddy gives her. That money could buy so much birth control!
Meanwhile, Madison and Jack are back together! The only problem? Madison doesn’t want to gateway sex anymore. She’s only interested in the real deal! Man, talk about jumping straight back into the sack — literally.
Amy has marriage on her mind, and Ricky is definitely feeling the pressure! Uh oh, we all know what Ricky does when he’s stressed — physical exercise of the naughtiest kind! When Nora asks her kiddo if he’s thinking about cheating on Amy, he pretty much says “hellz yeah.” Nooooo, Ricky! Don’t do it! We’re not the only ones who are worried about Ricky’s wandering eyes: George comes by to check in on his kinda, sorta son-in-law and he starts hitting on Nora right in front of Ricky. Dude, party fail!
Meanwhile, Amy and Ash finally pay their absent mother a visit, and Amy flips her shizzle about Adrian and Ben’s upcoming nuptials. We’ve hardly seen so much emotion come out of this girl! Amy calls up Ricky in a hysterical fit, and he straight up tells her that he doesn’t want to get married any time soon. Does that stop her from asking? Pssshhh, no way!
Ricky’s baby mama puts on her best lingerie and pounces her man as soon as she gets home, but he’s so not into it. Maybe it’s ‘cause Amy’s dad is watching the whole thing go down from the other room. Creepers! Even though Ricky practically begs Amy not to, she goes ahead and pops the question. If only, girl. Did you see Ricky’s face? He looked completely traumatized. We all want Ricky to put a ring on it, but this stud’s single and ready to mingle for life. The only person he’s saying “I do” to is his box of Trojans.
So, what will Ricky’s answer be? Tune into next week’s all new eppy to find out — we can’t wait!