Credit: MTV Photo: Teen Mom 3.12: Gary

We watch Teen Mom with a mixture of emotions, but when it comes to quotes, all we have to say is: WTF.

Check out the LOL-worthy one-liners from the season 3 finale, and try not to spit our your Gary-size container of diet Tang while you laugh.

5. Gary gets introspective: “I’m a man alone with his thoughts.”
Correction: You’re a man alone with his thoughts and an acoustic guitar. #dangerouscombo

4. Ryan calls out Maci: “That’s, like, the most childish thing I’ve ever heard.”

Well, other than every sentence that comes out of your mouth, yes!

3. Words of wisdom courtesy of Kyle King: “Life is tough, get a helmet.”

Pretty sure he’s talking about his dirt biking accident.

2. Gary tries his hand at French: “Au Revoir!” (Waves as the garage door closes.)

Little did we know there was a Frenchman hiding out in Gary’s goatee.

1. Amber yells at a random passerby: “Chick, you’re on some crack!”

And this is directly after a conversation about how great anger management is working out for her.