$#*! Blake Shelton Said on Twitter This Week: Flipping the Bird and Pooping on Pregnancy Tests

Shit!!! I was practicing my high kicks and I think I hyper-extended my scrotum..

— Blake Shelton (@blakeshelton) June 3, 2012

Hmmm... Can't decide if I want to watch "What Not To Wear" or head-butt a bowl of thumb tacks....

— Blake Shelton (@blakeshelton) June 3, 2012

“@TraceAdkins: Why don't you tweet me back, asshead? My wife's distraught over you breaking it off with her.”I broke it off IN her...

— Blake Shelton (@blakeshelton) June 3, 2012

I'm so drunk right now I just called 911 and shouted "Help!!! I can't tell the difference between Keira Knightley and Natalie Portman!!!"

— Blake Shelton (@blakeshelton) June 4, 2012

Musicians/Artists... Instead of wearing a baseball cap on the stage of the Grand Ol' Opry... Why not just walk out flipping the bird?

— Blake Shelton (@blakeshelton) June 5, 2012

I'm so drunk right now I just walked into Radio Shack pulled down my pants and shouted "Yall got a charger for this? Ineed to plug it in!"

— Blake Shelton (@blakeshelton) June 6, 2012

Does anyone know if the Red Headed woodpecker is endangered in Tennessee? If so I didn't just neck whip one with a well thrown broom handle.

— Blake Shelton (@blakeshelton) June 7, 2012

Tip of the day... By Blake SheltonGirls, shitting on your pregnancy test may not result in an accurate reading...

— Blake Shelton (@blakeshelton) June 8, 2012