Top 10 Castle Wisecracks From Season 3, Episode 10: “Last Call”
Oh, how we missed them. Castle and Friends left us in a dry, humorless world during their hiatus. That’s why it’s with extra special pleasure we present the Top 10 Wisecracks from last night’s episode.
10. Woman on dock (to man fishing on dock): Look, this is crazy. It’s the East River. The only thing you going to catch out here is a cold.
Yes, because that’s what the East River is notorious for — runny noses.
9. Beckett (on her smile): The only thing dazzling was how long it took my parents to pay for it.
‘Tis true. Anyone who’s had extensive orthodontic work done has teeth worth about $8 million.
8. Martha (on Alexis’s goth friend Gracie): Looks like someone’s not in Kansas anymore.
The good people of Kansas should be commended for enduring The Wizard of Oz. It’s their cross to bear.
7. Castle (to Esposito): Oh, so an ex-gambler dumped his life savings on an ex-con/ex-bookmaker and ends up ex-ed out.
Pretty much. And nice alliteration!
6. Ryan (to suspect Pick-up Pete): Congratulations, Pete. You’re our drunkest murder suspect this year. And that includes St. Patrick’s Day.
Uplifting and depressing all at once.
5. Castle (on the bratty millionaire who bought the old bottle of whiskey): If I was fifteen years younger, I’d give that guy such a pinch.
Solid verbal evidence that he’s not fifteen years younger.
4. Ryan (to Castle): We’re cops. We go to cop bars.
See, this is why we love Ryan. He says it plainly, but memorably. Also, he’s hot.
3. Castle (on grade school):Well, to be honest, beyond some baking soda volcanoes and sweaty palms, I have very little memory of it at all.
There’s not much else, except for long division and recess.
2. Castle (to Martha about the name of his bar): I was trying to come up with a Bogie reference myself. All I could think of was Castleblanca. I thought it was a little too on the nose.
Is it bad that we kind of like it?
1. Auction house director/killer Steven Heisler (to Castle): Are you familiar with a man by the name of Jimmy Walker?... Not the actor who played J.J. on Good Times.