Credit: HBO

Our obsession with True Blood knows no bounds (we're seconds away from prison-tattooing Eric's name across our stomachs), but do you end each episode suffocating in a fog of WTF? Join the club, vampers. Our jaws constantly drop at the supernatural antics in Bon Temps, and it's time to check out the biggest WTF moments from Season 5, Episode 11: "Sunset." And yes, most of these have to do with Bill "Traitors Among Us" Compton.

1. Bill Chops Off Kibwe's Head in a Jealous Rage

Look, we'll always have a tender spot in our hearts for Bill, but considering that he wants to take said hearts and binge eat them, it's kind of hard to love him. Not only does Bill worship a blood-soaked girl who has no idea what clothing is, but now he's taken to murdering anyone who might be better friends with her than he is. Basically, he's the most jealous boyfriend ever.

Poor Kibwe. All this dude wanted was to chillax with Lils, but someone had to fly into a rage and chop his head off. It's like, Bill. We know you have a weird fetish for heads — cough, Lorena, cough — but decapitation takes it to a whole new level.

2. Bill Bitch Slaps Jessica, Is Worst Dad Ever

Someone call Child Protective Services — Bill needs to have his custody revoked. We're all about tough love, but there's no way poor Baby Vamp deserved to have Bill's pinkie ring slap her across the face. First of all, no one should have to see that thing up-close, and second of all, that definitely qualified as child abuse.

Isn't the fact that Bill stole Jessica from her family, drank her bodily fluids, and buried her alive enough punishment for one lifetime? How much more is this girl supposed to take?

3. Bill Thinks He's The Chosen One, Makes Us LOL

We should have known there was something off about Bill when he forcibly sexed up Sookie in the back of a truck, drained a bunch of prostitutes, and went through that questionably "British" punk rock phase — but nothing could have prepared us for his latest antics. Bill just wants a little power in this Godric-forsaken world, and now he's conveniently decided that he's "the chosen one."

Reminder, William: There is only one chosen one, and his name is Neo. Last time we checked, you don't live in The Matrix or wear floor-length leather jackets, so let’s move on..

4. Elder Faerie Is a Big River-Dancing Hippie

Let's take a moment to chat about Sookie's faerie friends. When we first met these tutu-loving free spirits, they were frolicking around a lake like Tom Cruise circa Legends. Then we took a visit to Faerie Land, learned that these guys and dolls are secret goblins with buckteeth, and our world was turned upside down.

Most recently, faeries have discovered a passion for burlesque (Tinkerbell is horrified), and their leader appears to be a huge fan of interpretive River Dancing. Basically, we have no idea what's happening, but we're pretty sure we just met Mother Earth. Someone pass the organic kale chips — and turn up the Ke$ha?

5. Alcide's Dad Turns Out to Be a Professional Archer

This week, Alcide and his dad decided to murder a few vampires, at which point Papa Herveaux busted out a giant crossbow. As far as we're concerned, the only excuse for owning one of these bad boys is if you plan to volunteer as tribute in The Hunger Games, so we can only assume Papa Herveaux is a huge Katniss fangirl. No wonder he lives a life of solitude and drinks beer all day — fan fiction doesn't write itself!


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