Credit: John P. Johnson/HBO Photo: Pam Gets Low in Episode 4.03, "If You Love Me, Why Am I Dyin'?"

The True Blood writers deserve major props for the juicy quotes in “If You Love Me Why Am I Dyin’?” What else can we expect when the entire episode consisted of Jason making were-babies and Eric getting his feet tickled? Perfection! Check out the 10 best quotes from Season 4, Episode 3, and post your favorites on our Facebook page!

1. Pam gets serious: “I will personally eat, f**k and kill all three of you.”

Fingers crossed.

2. Eric’s clearly been watching Jersey Shore: “I know I’m a vampire, Snooki!”

So THAT’S why this vamp is always flashing his abs.

3. Bill hits on Portia Bellefleur: “I can never love you.”

He sure knows how to make a girl swoon.

4. Eric shows his vulnerable side: “It tickles ... You are really beautiful.”

We never thought we’d live to see the day Eric gets his feet ticked. 

Credit: John P. Johnson/HBO Photo: Lafayette: Hit

5. Lafayette dishes out some advice to Tara: “Bitch you need to do yourself a solid and get the f**k on out this f**ked up place.”

Whatever, things are just getting fun.

6. Lafayette continues to blow our minds: “I’m going to beddy-bed, ya’ll bitches clean.”

Flawless.

7. Crystal dirty talks: “I’m gonna be mama to all your baby cubs. Of which there will be many.”

Uhhh, hot?

Credit: Facebook Photo: Tara Looks Terrified in True Blood Season 4

8. Tara explains why she left Bon Temps: “I was just traumatized.”

It’s like, grow a pair.

9. Eric makes Sookie an offer she can’t refuse: “Would you like to be mine?”

Except she does refuse.

10. Sookie: “You killed my fairy godmother!”

Great, now Sookie can’t cash in on her pumpkin carriage and glass slippers.