Remember back when Hoyt was an adorable momma's boy who loved Jessica with all his heart and would never do anything to hurt her? Well, now he's an emo fangbanger with a searing hatred for vampires, and we are so worried that he's going to kill Baby V.

Hoyt has officially joined Bon Temps' local hate group, and it's only a matter of time before he slips on his Obama mask and takes vampy lives. Even worse? His supe-hating homies want nothing more than for him to exact revenge on Jessica for stealing his heart, and he might just be dumb enough to listen.

If Hoyt kills Jessica he'll regret it for the rest of his life, but more importantly, we'll suffer a fainting spell and voluntarily slip into a coma in protest. Don't do it, Bubba!