‘Vampire Diaries’ Recap: Caroline & Alaric Are Engaged!
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Credit: Tina Rowden/The CW    

The Vampire Diaries

‘Vampire Diaries’ Recap: Caroline & Alaric Are Engaged!

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Holy plot twists! Seven seasons in, The Vampire Diaries has yet to break its ridiculous (and wonderful) plot pace. In this episode alone — Season 7, Episode 6 (“Best Served Cold”) — we get Damon and Stefan trying to kill their new stepdad, Alaric saying goodbye to the vampire living in his dead wife’s body, and the revelation that the history professor’s unborn babies are still alive — inside of Caroline.

Yeah, we’re going to need at least a week to process all of that. In the meantime, here is a breakdown of the seven craziest things that happened in “Best Served Cold.”

Caroline is engaged to Alaric in the future.

What?! In this week’s three-year flash forward, we learn that Caroline’s mystery fiancé is none other than Alaric. We are less enthused about this future coupling than we were about Bonnie and Enzo, who weirdly kind of make sense.

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Alaric and Caroline, though? All we can think about is how he was her high school teacher. Sure, age has different meaning on TVD — and on TV where “teenagers” are so often played by 20-somethings. But still. What do these two even have in common? You know, besides the fact that Caroline is apparently carrying around Ric’s unborn twins.

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Credit: Tina Rowden/The CW    

Stefan tries to kill Julian.

TVD has always known how to throw a party. In tonight’s episode, the party in question is Lily’s and it’s in honor of her recently-revived Heretic man-crush Julian. And, as is the TVD tradition, this party gets bloody before it’s over.

Still broken up about the news that Julian killed his unborn baby 150 years ago (yeah, there were a lot of unborn babies in this episode), Stefan vows to kill Julian. Tonight. Damon, intent on letting Lily remember what it is to love and be loved before he takes Julian from her, spends the entire party trying to stop his baby brother.

It’s always interesting when Stefan and Damon reverse roles — i.e. the impetuous one who acts rashly and the even-keeled one who thinks things through — and watching Damon foil Stefan’s plans actually provided a lot of comic relief. Those Salvatore brothers!

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The mood of the party quickly turns sour when Stefan, with the aid of Matt, manages to incapacitate Damon and give killing Julian the old college try. Though he manages to both stake his new stepdad and set him on fire, Lily shows up and saves Julian before Stefan can do any permanent damage. Then, things get really intense...

Then, Julian beats Stefan and Damon up.

When Julian recovers from being staked and set on fire, he sits his girlfriend’s kids down for a little chat about respect and, somehow, this episode turns into a domestic abuse Lifetime movie with Lily fighting to protect her sons from her angry boyfriend.

It’s weirdly effective, even though Damon and Stefan are the farthest thing from helpless victims and violence on this show is so contorted that snapping someone’s neck is basically the equivalent of a tickle these days. It gets even realer, however, when Stefan and Damon reminisce about how Julian’s abuse reminded them of dear old dad. Dark stuff, guys.

We also finally get Lily to admit that she cares about her sons — or, you know, would prefer if they didn’t die. The best thing about bringing Julian on as a villain is that this gives Lily room to redeem herself. She doesn’t have to drive the villainy plot in the same way and we are here for it.

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Credit: Tina Rowden/The CW    

Alaric has a chance to say goodbye to Jo. Sort of.

Speaking of the worst, poor Florence The Vampire who ended up in Jo’s body. Turns out vampire souls can’t exist in human bodies (because of course), which means Flo doesn’t even make it to the end of the episode. She does, however, give Ric a chance to properly say goodbye to his wife (even though it’s not really her).

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Flo and Ric have a weirdly nice moment for two strangers who just met, and it actually doesn’t feel contrived. They both needed each other in bizarre ways.

Someone’s collecting humans at the high school.

In a disturbing twist, someone is using the abandoned high school to stockpile compelled humans. They just sit there, connected to IVs, and it is seriously creepy. Bonnie and Matt thankfully find them, but are admittedly in over their heads — especially without the knowledge of who’s behind this. Easy money is on Julian, though. That guy’s THE WORST.

Damon and Stefan talk kids.

It’s kind of crazy that this show has matured to a point that one of the main thematic subplots of this episode was Damon and Stefan confiding in one another about their desire to become dads. (Dudes, it’s called adoption. With the power of compulsion, you don’t even have to go through all of the paperwork!)

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It’s nice to see the Salvatore bros have such a positive relationship for such an extended period of time. They are getting along so well that Damon even agrees to abandon his master plan to wait on the Let’s Kill Julian Initiative and kill Julian right this second or whatever. Aww.

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Credit: Tina Rowden/The CW    

Alaric’s babies are still alive — and they’re inside of Caroline.

So that’s how TVD is going to write in Candice Accola King’s pregnancy. Interesting. We’re not sure how we feel about this particular development. Mystical baby plots don’t have the best track record on TV, but — you have to admit — TVD still knows how to craft up a crazy plot twist. This show has still got it.

The Vampire Diaries Season 7 airs Thursdays at 8 p.m. ET on The CW.

Check out more of Wetpaint’s coverage of The Vampire Diaries Season 7 below:

TVD Gets Two 2015 People’s Choice Award Noms
Watch the Vampire Diaries Season 7 Trailer
Will Bonnie Get a New Romance in Season 7?
Complete List of New Season 7 Cast Members
Heretics to Bring “Darkness” to Season 7