If you’re like us, you’ve seen every Twilight movie once, maybe even twice. (And maybe suppress a laugh every time Jacob and his tribe “brothers” rip off their clothes and burst into 12-foot-tall werewolves who are, oddly, still pettable.) In TV Land, there are tons of different ways to transform into the half-wolf/half-human creatures that are a little less silly than Twilight’s. We’ve broken down the ways our fave supernatural folk embrace the furry beast within.
The Vampire Diaries
On our fave CW show, embracing your inner teen wolf is no joke. As Tyler Lockwood (Michael Trevino) has shown, it involves about 30 minutes of sweaty, convulsing, bone-breaking agony. Basically, the change throws you to the ground, where you writhe in mind-blowing pain while your body reshapes itself.
Going wolf in Mystic Falls also requires careful planning. A dog prefers to be alone. It is helpful if he has an old family dungeon filled with unbreakable Civil War-era iron chains that he can use to restrain himself. If you care about your peeps, as our Ty does, you kindly advise all loved ones to steer clear. If you are peppy vamp Caroline (Candice Accola), you will regularly ignore this advice.
On TVD, the man-to-wolf transition produces a large, menacing, yellow-eyed creature that looks pretty canine. An unpredictable rage-a-holic, he hugs the shadows and is just as likely to bite you as he is to look at you. Oh, and if you’re a vampire? That bite is deadly, so there’s no petting this pup.
There’s also no using of the werewolf thing to benefit mankind. Unlike on other shows, Elena (Nina Dobrev) and co. don’t ask Tyler to be a good boy and help them sniff out wayward vamp friends. But more on that later.
Werewolves like Tyler are born, not made. If your dad was a dog, like it or not, eventually you will be too, if you trigger the curse (aka, kill someone). The only upside: You won’t be obsessed with making new manimals. Squashing the urge to eat your teammates? Well, that’s another matter entirely.
On HBO’s bloodsucker series, turning wolf is no big woof — especially for the hottest Were around: Alcide Herveaux (Joe Manganiello). The simple two-step process goes like this: First you get naked, then — snap! — you morph into a modestly sized American Gray. Lickety-split fast, the shift is painless and no aspirin is required. A third step that involves a pre-morph growl or a yellow-eyed glare is optional, depending on whether you’re turning to kick ass or chow down.
Around Bon Temps, the hairy transition is treated like a cool parlor trick that gains you entry into the most codependent frat on the planet: The Pack. Alcide and the other bayou dogs prefer to howl at the moon en masse. Instead of seeing the wolf thing as a monthly curse, they embrace it as righteous excuse to party and to free their inner biker.
As with TVD, the best True Blood werewolves are born. But others are made. And we hear the induction ceremony is a b****. Not only will you be tasked to pledge allegiance to a nutty pack leader like scrawny Cooter, you will be required to eat his corpse after he dies. Bon appetit!
Alcide and his pack go wolf on command — day or night. The canine ability comes with perks like superhuman strength and speed, a great sense of smell and a sexy growl. But be forewarned: If needy Sookie Stackhouse (Anna Paquin) is around, you will be asked to help her sniff out a lost vampire friend or to protect her trouble-magnet self from all manner of supernatural kind.
On MTV’s werewolf drama, lycanthropy turns awkward geeks like Scott McCall (Tyler Posey) into smoldering lacrosse stars. Rather than a dirt-sniffing dog that walks on four paws, the change forces them to run upright on two fairly human legs in skinny jeans.
Unlike TVD’s torturous transitions, Scott’s change is more nerve-wracking than backbreaking. Basically he gets angry and grows fangs and itchy, long brown hair. But he’s totally still kissable.
In fact, when teens go wolf in Beacon Hills, they lose their shirts and shoes but keep their pants and their humanity. Well, mostly. As Season 2’s bite-happy villain proves, they do become a bit obsessed with recruiting new members to the Wolfman Club.
But there is a major downside. In TW-land, werewolfism comes with a serious case of red eye. As alphas like Derek (Tyler Hoechlin) shift from human to wolf, their irises blaze hazard red. It is not a good look. Oh, and there are packs of hunters whose mission it is to destroy the shapeshifters.
Teen Wolf features both natural-born werewolves like Derek and man-made hounds like Scott (and now, Erica). There’s also a rigidly enforced hierarchy. The Alpha is the boss and can bark down his Betas. How do you get to be leader of the pack? By killing the original Alpha.