Credit: Bob Mahoney/The CW ©2011 Photo: Gloria Mixes up Drinks in Season 3, Episode 3: “The End of the Affair”

One thing we’ll never say about The Vampire Diaries: “You took the words right out of our mouths.” Elena and the gang utter things we’d never dream of saying — or at least hope we never have to. Without further ado, here are the 20 notable quotables from Season 3, Episode 3, “The End of the Affair.”

20. Intervention!
Damon  (to Stefan): “She’s not going anywhere until she’s got you checked into vampire rehab and on the mend. Trust me.”

19. Was that an insult?
Klaus: “I see they’ve opened the doors to the riffraff now.”
Damon: “Oh honey, I’ve been called worse.”

18. The truth hurts
Stefan (to Elena): “I don’t want to see you. I don’t want to be with you. I just want you to go.”

17. The short answer? Yes
Tyler (to Caroline): “Would now be a bad time to give you crap about sneaking out on me?”

16. Do you miss me?
Damon (to Katherine): “Well, Stefan is still Klaus’s little prisoner and Elena still thinks she can save him and no one has thought about you since you left.”

15. Kitty’s got your back
Katherine: “Spend five hundred years running and there will be a few people looking out for you.”

14. Bad-Memory Lane
Klaus: “I know how much you loved it here. Bringing back memories of the good old Ripper days.”
Stefan: “I blocked out most of them. A lot of blood. A lot of partying. The details are all a blur.”
Klaus: “Well, that is a crying shame. The details are what make it legend.”

13. A father’s love?
Caroline’s father, Bill: “Blood controls you sweetheart. This is how I’m going to fix you.” [He opens the skylight.]

12. Whatchu trying to say?
Elena: “It’s an antique, Damon. Like you.”

11. Now that’s flirting
Stefan: “Are you ever going to tell me your name?”
Rebekah: “Sure. When you earn it.”

10. Joke of the day
Klaus: “So a hybrid walks into a bar…”
Gloria, the witch: “Stop. You may be invincible but that doesn’t make you funny.”

9. Fitzgerald and fangs
Damon: “Stefan was a cocky Ripper douche, but I could avoid him and still indulge in a few Daisy Buchanans of my own.”

8. It hurts me more than it hurts you
Bill: “I’m conditioning you to associate vampirism with pain.”

7. Systems check
Damon (to Elean after she finds Stefan's list of victims): “Still handling it?”

6. Don’t you forget about me
Stefan: “I don’t recognize her.”
Klaus: “Don’t tell her that. Rebekah’s temper is worse than mine.” [He removes the dagger from Rebekah’s chest.] “Time to wake up little sister.”

5. Oh captain, my captain
Klaus (to Stefan): “You have many useful talents. In fact, I learned some of my best tricks from you.”

4. Sweet talk
Damon: “Gloria, if I knew you were going to age like this I would have stuck around.”

3. Daddy issues
Caroline: “Why are you trying to fix me?”
Bill: “So that I don’t have to kill you.”

2. Not without my daughter
Sheriff Liz Forbes: “That’s our daughter in there. She looks up to you.”
Bill: “Let me do this, Liz. Not because she’s a monster but because we love her.”

1. That’s what friends are for…
Stefan: “If we were such best friends, why do I only know you as hybrid dick who sacrificed my girlfriend on an altar of fire?”

 

Credit: You Tube Photo: Preview Clip of Vampire Diaries Season 3, Episode 3, “The End of the Affair”: Damon and Elena Visit Chicago
Credit: Bob Mahoney/The CW ©2011 Photo: Gloria Mixes up Drinks in Season 3, Episode 3: “The End of the Affair”

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Credit: You Tube Photo: Preview Clip of Vampire Diaries Season 3, Episode 3, “The End of the Affair”: Damon and Elena Visit Chicago