Credit: Bob Mahoney/The CW ©2011 The CW Network, LLC Photo: Damon Stakes Katherine in Season 2, Episode 16: "The House Guest"
Damon Salvatore is the snark king of Mystic Falls. Sure, he mumbles and has a tendency to smirk. But oh — the things that come out of his mouth! So what witticisms did prime time’s finest bloodsucker drop this week? Here are Damon’s best zingers from Episode 16, “The House Guest.”

5. What is that?

Damon (to Stefan): Some kind of crazy as psychic witch attack! Get over there and do something about it.

4. We double-dare you

Damon: Why are you still here?
Katherine: Because you haven’t forcibly removed me.
[Damon playfully points a flamethrower at her.]
Katherine: You wouldn’t.
Damon: Oh, I would.

3. Now tell me a story

Damon (to Stefan): What did Papa Witch and Baby witch have to say?

2. The unwelcome mat


Katherine: I’m hungry.
Damon: You’re my unwanted houseguest. Go feed yourself.

1. Best exchange ever!

Katherine: You hurt me today.
Damon: Tit for tat.
Katherine: You were mean and very rough and monstrous.
Damon: You deserved it.
Katherine: I like this Damon. [leans in to kiss him]
Damon: Katherine, there are six other bedrooms in this house. [Damon’s lips brush Katherine’s] Go find one.