There are two reasons one might think Vampire DiariesIan Somerhalder (Damon Salvatore) was on Gossip Girl: The CW network likes to keep its actors in the family (Ian appeared on the network’s Smallville for a few episodes), and the actor bears a slight resemblance to Chace Crawford, who played Nate Archibald on the show. 

Alas, this is one crossover The CW never made. However, we love a good fanfic, so here’s how we picture it going down:

Ian portrays Astor Knickerbocker, a devastatingly handsome playboy who gives Serena van der Woodsen the smolder eyes at Blair Waldorf’s blacktie bridge game. He amuses her with a few quips before vanishing without a trace. The pattern continues over several episodes. Serena is intrigued by the stranger and quickly falls for him.

After a complex series of events unfolds, it’s revealed that Astor is really Richard Archibald, Nate’s penniless half-brother, who was scheming to marry Serena for her money. Oh, the humanity! Nate threatens to turn Richard in to the cops, and he’s never heard from again.