SPOILERS AHEAD! Stop reading if you don't want details on The Walking Dead episode that aired on October 21.

Sh-t happens, right? You survive the zombie apocalypse for 10 months, not even knowing there was a zombie apocalypse, then this group of bloody humans storms your prison and chops you in the middle of the head with a machete. Talk about a case of the Mondays!

Since Rick (Andrew Lincoln) isn’t wearing his sheriff’s hat on The Walking Dead Season 3, he should at least wear a sign reading “Stranger Danger.” He has a low tolerance for new humans, as those guys in the bar on Season 2 could tell you. New Rick reared his alpha head on Episode 2, "Sick," which included a sick human-to-human head slice. However, Old Rick is still here, so not every one of the new prison humans died. There’s a new white guy with a fantastic mustache who may end up being the new Randall. He sobbed and pleaded for his life and he got to live. Only one other prison guy, of the original five we met at the end of last week's premiere, was left alive by the end. Is that the last we’ll see of them? Do you care to see more? Speaking of seeing more, what happened to Andrea (Laurie Holden) and Michonne (Danai Gurira)? Not one minute of them this episode. Not cool.

By the way, while New Rick got full-on alpha this episode, Carol (Melissa McBride) proved herself the new Hershel (Scott Wilson) — and also the new Frankenstein, wanting to experiment on walkers — Maggie (Lauren Cohan) just about gave up on her dad, Carl (Chandler Riggs) found the infirmary and the stones to stand up to his mom, more people bossed Glenn (Steven Yeun) around, and Lori (Sarah Wayne Callies) — of all people — saved Hershel’s life by giving him CPR. Well, she does kind of need him alive to deliver her baby. You can’t really trust that Carol could do it. But Hershel is now alive, while three prisoners are dead or on the way to dead. And someone was apparently watching Carol as she cut into a walker. Who was that? This is not a teaching hospital! Walk away!

Read on for a full recap of Episode 2:

Credit: Gene Page/AMC Photo: The Walking Dead prisoners

RIGHT WHERE WE LEFT OFF
No big time jump this week. While Hershel lies on the floor with his bloody, eaten leg, we meet the five-member boy band prison group that’s just been there the whole time, apparently. (By the way, how are you liking the new opening credits? It would still be nice to see the old picture of Shane again, just to remember his presence.) In a funky game of chase, the Ricktatorship rolls Hershel along a makeshift gurney as the five prison guys just follow them into the main area. (Tip: Run, new guys! Just leave while you can.)

CAROL ORDERS PEOPLE AROUND!
Carol is Hershel when Hershel is gone? Go, new not useless Carol! She seems to be in charge of saving Hershel, which may just doom him. Meanwhile, her flirt-mate, Daryl (Norman Reedus), is in charge of keeping the prisoners at bay. He pardons them (ha!) and tells them to leave. One guy thinks if civilians are breaking into a prison, there may be nowhere better to go. Good point. Rick tells Glenn if Hershel dies, Glenn has to be there for that. Maggie will freak. But why is Glenn always being told what to do? If anyone knows what’s up, it’s Glenn. Remember when he told Rick off — back when he saved Rick’s life when they first met in Atlanta on Season 1? Good times.

THE MENFOLK SQUARE OFF
The prisoners suggest Rick and company take Hershel to a hospital. Awwwwkwwwarrrd! “How long you been locked in that cafeteria?” Ten months. 264 days or so. Sorry, lovahs, but the world ended. Everything’s gone. The prisoners are sad. They also don’t get it. They want cell phones to call home. Good luck with that. Rick estimates that at least half the population has been wiped out, maybe more. Rick also casually tells them “We’re all infected.” It took us two seasons to learn that and these guys get the truth within maybe 10 minutes. Rick also has an alpha male battle with a couple of the newbies, haggling for space. Boys, boys, you’re all pretty! The guy with the mustache — Axel (Lew Temple), apparently — wants them all to get along. The two groups vow to split the food — 50/50 — then split up, after Rick’s group helps them clear a cell block. Rick threatens that if he even smells one of the prisoner guys, he’ll kill him. Their olfactory senses must be overloaded with all the blood, sweat and death. 

Credit: AMCtv.com

LORI ISN’T WORRIED, MAGGIE WANTS DAD TO BE AT PEACE
As we noted last week, if Hershel isn’t 100 percent, Lori’s going to have a helluva time getting that baby out.

Lori: “Look at me. Do I look worried?”
Carol: “You look disgusting.”
Lori: “So do you.”

See the smell reference above. Maggie is worried about what will happen if Hershel doesn’t die and does wake up. How will he be able to walk? Glenn says Hershel has Maggie and Beth. Maggie feels like she’s the only one living in reality. He’s just trying to keep spirits up. What’s he supposed to say, “Yeah, your dad is screwed”? Beth is more optimistic, but she was the one who told Lori the prison would be a great place to have the baby. Beth is sweet and cute, but she’s a little too Disney with the bright side talk. Maggie has a tearful talk with the still sleeping/passed out Hershel. She tells him to go ahead and die. She and Beth will be fine. “Be peaceful. … If it’s time to go, it’s OK.”

LORI GIVES RICK THE GREEN LIGHT TO KILL
Rick gives Lori the scoop on the new group. They have at least one gun. What happens if things go south?

Lori: “What are your options?”
Rick: “Kill ‘em.”
Lori: “If that’s what you think is best.”
Rick: “You say this now.”
Lori: “Look, I know that I’m a sh-tty wife and I’m not winning any Mother of the Year awards, but I need you to know that not for one second do I believe there’s malice in your heart. You’re not a killer and I know that. I know that. So do whatever you gotta do to keep this group safe, and do it with a clear conscience.”

Well, technically he is a killer. Just ask those people last season at the bar. But now Lady Macbeth has given her official blessing for him to take care of that group if this group is ever in danger. People are giving permission to die all over the place this episode.

CARL VS. HIS MOM
Carl went to the infirmary. Got supplies. Medicine. Probably saved Hershel’s life. And yeah, Mom, he did it alone. “It was no big deal. I killed two walkers.” Go new not useless Carl! But, of course, Lori doesn’t see it that way. Lori, unlike Rick, is not treating Carl like a peer. She’s furious that he went off alone. Carl yelled, “Get off my back!” Our little baby's all grows up! Beth shuts Carl up by telling him he can’t talk to his mother like that. Since Carl has a crush on Beth, it works. He just runs out, stopping Lori before she can finish another one of her classic patronizing "I appreciate..." speeches. Team Carl on this one.

CELL BLOCK TANGO WITH WALKERS
One bad thing about filming in a prison is it’s very dark and shadowy. But we get to see these prison guys at work. They seem to enjoy killing walkers, as T-Dog, Rick and Daryl watch them go at it. Annnnd somebody got bit! It’s the big guy — Big Tiny (Theodus Crane). The prisoners just want to quarantine him. Rick says there’s nothing they can do. Tomas (Nick Gomez) knocks the guy out and beats the crap out of him till he’s dead dead. Oh man, this guy and Shane would’ve been besties.

CAROL WANTS TO PRETEND SOME DEAD WALKER LADY IS PREGGERS
Carol pulls Glenn outside and points to a walker. “That one.” She wants to use one of the walkers for practice, when it comes to delivering Lori’s baby. C-section experimenting on zombies? Wow. She takes a rod and smashes the poor dead woman’s brain. Then Glenn is dispatched to distract the other walkers so Carol can get the cadaver for practice. Because the prison alone wasn’t gruesome enough? And why is everyone always telling Glenn what to do? He wanted to stay inside but she forced him to do this.

RICK IS THE ALPHA MALE. THERE SHALL BE NO OTHER ALPHA MALES BUT HE.
There’s a huge walker battle when they try to clear one of the cell blocks and the main prison leader, Tomas, takes a swing at Rick. Daryl saves Rick, but Rick does not move on from the moment. “Sh-t happens,” Rick says, staring Tomas down in a zombie apocalypse version of the high noon shootout. Alpha male vs. Alpha male. WICKED KILL, RICK!  He slices Tomas down the head with his machete. It’s the bar all over again. White guy with the whiskers disavows all affiliation with Tomas. One of the guys runs away and Rick chases him. Rick couldn’t find Sophia to save his life but he tracks this guy easily enough. (Maybe it was his smell?) He leaves the prisoner guy with all the walkers. Oh, New Rick is ruthless, especially when he has the backing of Same Old Lori. Two of the prisoners are left to fend for themselves.

HERSHEL IS ALIVE
Lori does some CPR to save Hershel, who had apparently lost his heartbeat. He woke up and seemed to make a grab for her, like he was a walker. Carl trained his gun on him. But then … Hershel was normal again? Just a bad dream? Maybe he’s always been that way. Some people are just cranky as hell when you wake them up. He’s fine, now, although he’s still minus part of his leg.

LORI AND RICK HAVE A NICE TALK
For the record, he doesn’t think Lori is a bad mother. But it’s funny how neither one of these two ever has any idea of where Carl is at any given moment. Bad wife is a different story, Lori said. But what can they do, get divorced? “We got food, Hershel’s alive. Today was a good day.” Tell that to the guys who were in that prison for 10 months until you showed up! Lori and Rick compliment each other on how they acted. It’s easy to be nice when times are “good.” Rick said they are “awful grateful” for what Lori did, but even during their talk, they stare straight ahead and don’t really look at each other. The fence does not make for a good therapist. He’s like her boss now, not her husband. Should’ve backed Team Shane, girl. He loved you no matter what.

COMING UP
The helicopter! And Andrea and Michonne! And the Governor! Oh, man. It's going to be great when Rick and the Governor have their intense alpha male stare-down. The sexual tension will be off the charts. But seriously, there was no way to recut this episode with even a smidgen of Michandrea?

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