Credit: Ray Mickshaw/FOX ©2012 Fox Broadcasting Co.

You guys, we know where Simon Cowell lives. Well, we don't know exactly –– but it appears to be some kind of modern hut filled with tepid pools of water, white walls and the scent of body oil. Simon's in his element now that he's mentoring groups of hopeful starlets in his own home, and his words of wisdom are more potent than ever. And yes, the rest of the judges had some good quotes this week as well. Heed their words, ya'll. Heed.

10. Random sad contestant gets rejected: "No. Nooooooooo!"
If you close your eyes, maybe it'll go away.

9. L.A. Reid checks out his group with disdain: "I'm not happy."
Wow, L.A., way to be an upper.

8. Demi has the sads: "Her light was a little dimmed after I gave her advice."
Sigh, she's so poetic you guys. POEMS!

7. Nick Jonas creeps on Jillian: "Maybe it's out of line, but she's kinda sexy."
Yes, Nick. That is out of line. As is the decorative pom-pom on your jacket.

6. Cece feels melancholy: "Imagine having to go back and sell stamps."
Well, this is just an amazing sentence.

5. Britney phone chats with Simon: "I'm gonna bring it, and beat you."
With an umbrella, we assume. (Too soon?)

4. Marc Anthony tries his hand at a pep talk: "This could be the first day of the rest of your life....Or not."
Ever since his breakup with J.Lo, Marky Marc hasn't been the same.

3. Simon threatens Emblem3: "If we shake hands on a deal, and you renege, I kill you."
It's like he's not even trying to shock us any more.

2. L.A. tells it like it is: "We can keep him, but he won't last."
Our prediction? Death by broken heart.

1. Lyric Da Queen chats about her hometown: "People either go to prison, or they're dead. I've been to more funerals than weddings."
Sounds eerily similar to The X Factor.

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